I stand by the door, one foot in and the other foot out

Tearing between the locks

This house that holds all of my tears are falling on carpet that has longed since drowned…

I’m not happy here anymore…

The walls are burned and the ceilings all cave in on me, the floor boards creak when I walk around…

I am always nervous, always expecting, always needing, always ready…

Ready…

To leave…

I look at my daughters pleading eyes, and I see her daddy flash before her eyes, but what about what mother wants

The daddy always needs my heart, this home always needs my presence, and my little girl is the only one who needs without putting burden on my heart.

This house doesn’t care about what I need…

The handle is in my hands, poised, and is kinetic

All of the energy in the world to be turned and released, it just needs the command

But I am weak

Please house, stop taking all of me, leave me with at least eyes for crying

My hands are calloused from washing dishes that never seem to be put away

Back aches from scrubbing floors that always made me fall

There was love in this house

There still is

But that love is no longer coming from inside of me

I am miserable

I wonder can the walls hold paintings of misery

I bet they can’t cuz a human breaks when we do

There are spirits that dwell in this house who trap me here

They whisper to me in the morning and they lay in bed with me at night

I vomit after weeks of consuming nothing

I stand by the door, one foot in and the other foot out

Tearing between the locks

This house that holds all of my tears are falling on carpet that has longed since drowned…

I’m not happy here anymore…