A BELIEVER AND A LEADER
I was always
Running inside,
Pushing to extreme
Looking for a ride.
Trying to figure
How to calm the fear,
My mind slipping
Like it stripped a gear.
My hurt now showing up
As torrid anger,
Looking to be
The perfect gang banger.
Anger constantly pushing me
Where I dare not go,
Being a contract killer
All I wanted to know.
Such a cold heart,
Such a young man,
Being this way
Not part of my plan.
Confused, dazed,
Wanting to kill,
Who do I tell
Just how I feel?
Always feeling like
A Jekyll and Hyde,
Having no one
In whom I could confide.
Not being able
To hold a job, at my best,
Future now cloudy,
What do I do next?
Now feeling my only hope
Is to pick up fast and run,
But now what do I do
With my wife and son?
Knowing whatever I did
I could not let them down,
That’s when I first started
Turning my life around.
Now knowing no way
I could repeat my childhood,
My love for my family
Would make me be good.
It was a hard choice,
I simply wanted to be bad,
It was constantly beat into me
Turns out it’s all I had.
There was something planted
In me from my youth,
It was the love of God
And the absolute truth.
I decided to water it
And watch it grow,
It took the hate, anger,
And what else, only God knows.
It is because of Him
I became a total believer,
And through that learned
To become a good leader.
Rodney Timms, Author
March 3, 2012
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