A Void in Space

4 Comments

Tags:
  • Death
    • ,
  • Infinity
    • ,
  • Lost Souls

    Poem Commentary

    This was based on my poem Set Free. I had a request to add to Set Free. I was thinking about the infinity of outerspace one day thinking their must be a place so distant that stars can't even be seen. This led to writing both these poems.

    A Void in Space

    A Void in Space

    Living a life of drudge and torment
    All the years have come and went
    Had gone through life day by day
    On this earth no place to stay

    Years dragged on from A to Z
    Mind and spirit now set free
    No porch light on. No open door
    No “Mornin’ Sir”. No sighs. No more.

    Not a sound, nor flicker of light
    No apple pie, no winter’s bite
    Swallowed up by muck and mire
    In a pine box, bones retired

    Never belonged.  Not close to best
    As in life and so in death
    No one said “g’ bye”.  Not a wave
    Parted from body and from grave

    To a black hole where lost souls reside
    Where turmoil, grief and self-pity collide
    A void in space forever distant
    Time to get there near to infinite

    No planets, no comets, no burning star
    Engulfed in a vacuum immensely far
    Stagnant thoughts turned to black ice
    Can’t return to the living.  Caught in a vise.

    Poem Comments

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    ccslim commented on A Void in Space

    06-09-2013

    Painfully well written. An invisible life brought to life with rhyme and depth.
    Reply to Comment

    Altair commented on A Void in Space

    02-14-2013

    the darker and realistic vision of absence and death...quite the approach,, so quaint yet large in the sense of striking my thought...well done sir, Ill be back to visit your expressions
    Reply to Comment

    MootPoint

    02/26/2013

    Thank you for commenting. :)

    jademelissa74 commented on A Void in Space

    02-13-2013

    Whoa! What a great biographical thriller. You manage to maintain the reader engaged in every line. My favorite line "No apple pie", I love apple pie and the full realization of the void that death brings became bright after that line to me. Excellent writing. Thank you for posting.
    Reply to Comment

    MootPoint

    02/13/2013

    I like how winter's bite and apples are mentioned in the same line. Thank you for taking the time to comment. :)

    dahlusion commented on A Void in Space

    02-12-2013

    The feelings expressed in this piece are from the soul and filled with the truth of existence; a brilliant write presented with passion. "To a black hole where lost souls reside"—beautiful!
    Reply to Comment

    MootPoint

    02/12/2013

    Thank you so much for your comment.

    windsongs

    02/12/2013

    or considering all points with some measured to an unbearable magnitude-no escape .............

    To have great poets there must be great audiences too.

    Walt Whitman, American Poet (1819-1892)

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