Abandoned

15 Comments

Tags:
  • Sadness

    Poem Commentary

    My mom did kick me out. But I'm sure I will be back home soon...

    Abandoned

    My feet are cold...
    Dog teeth tear my soul out
    And it sits before me,
    hollow...
    Petrified and in chains.
    I explained how my mother kicked me out.
    And how it all happened so close to Christmas.
    I told her that I would leave and not come back.
    But where will I go?

    A couch there.
    A hotel here.
    The TV warms my thirty dollar room in a blue-ish glow.
    My mother's face floods my head.
    She smiles at me, waving, and heading toward a light.
    A light far away from me and everything I stand for.

    But yet, I still love her.
    Merry Christmas, Mom.

    By: Brandi Deacon
    2010

    Poem Comments

    (15)

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    boomboom56 commented on Abandoned

    01-31-2011

    sad stuff for sure. you have a good way with words.

    BringMeBullets

    03/25/2011

    Aww, thank you. :)

    irreverent commented on Abandoned

    01-14-2011

    This is very sad, but also very well written.................good luck.

    BringMeBullets

    03/25/2011

    Thank you. :)

    Marsink commented on Abandoned

    01-07-2011

    Brandi, I had contempt for my dad (beatings) but waited till I was 19. This story brings out the beautiful and raw force from your writing and claws at the emotion of the reader. I hope you choose your friends as wisely as your words for this moving work! Applause Crescendo!

    BringMeBullets

    03/25/2011

    Yes. I think we have all come to find out that parents aren't always right... Thank you.

    BrokenHeart2009 commented on Abandoned

    01-04-2011

    I think this poem is brace and forgiving in in the dark times we must forgive. I like how you said you still love her.

    BringMeBullets

    03/25/2011

    Thank you. :)

    tenderpoison commented on Abandoned

    01-03-2011

    this is very sad - as the mother of several teens, I know things get a pretty hairy. be safe girl, the world is a cruel, cruel place at times.

    BringMeBullets

    03/25/2011

    Thank you. :)

    Poetry is not a turning loose of emotion, but an escape from emotion.

    T. S. Eliot (1888-1965) American-English poet and playwright.

    BringMeBullets’s Poems (75)

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    Title Comments
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    A House, A Home 2
    Untilted IV 2
    Quality of Life 2
    Shean 0
    March 1
    Abandoned 15
    Ravens & Razor Blades 25
    Adam and Eve 26
    Dragons Of My Heart 28
    Gentile Dreaming 11
    Your Light 16
    Pretty Mouth 15
    Stars on the Ceiling 19
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    Lamb 7
    Taylor 5
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    Cloudburst 9
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    Untitled III 7
    Untitled II 11
    Undone 6
    William 6
    Picture Book 12
    Our Season 8
    Breathtaking 13
    Same Excuses 15
    Define Me 11
    Silhouettes 10
    Give In To The Night 16
    Acid 19
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    Pick Up 16
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