Cast Away Abel

2 Comments

Poem Commentary

I grew up giving people the benefit of the doubt, and for the most part, I still do. But I refuse to just trust someone at their given word. I have seen to many people follow blindly, and I promise one of those people won't be me. I will loan you my respect and trust, but if you don't earn it in time, then you don't deserve it.

Cast Away Abel

Claim it for the love of another
And quickly justify your bloodshed
Do not question; mere puppets cannot talk
Repeat your rhetoric of vain words said
Cast away Abel, your foolish brother demands
So you promptly retrieve your hammer,
And crucify a man
Forbidden is the man to mingle with a soul
Mark his chest with a scarlet letter
And never secondguess what your told
Justice demanded from an innocent mind
All while the only offender hoards his tangled lies.

Poem Comments

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dumplin commented on Cast Away Abel

02-17-2010

Do not take offense to this as it is my nature to point out little errors that you can correct in the future and make yourself a better writer, but you should learn the difference between your and you're. This is very lovely a piece, though. Keep up the good work!

danmartyjake1 commented on Cast Away Abel

02-16-2010

You craft a story so well, all while adding to the understanding and meaning of it through your woven passages. Beautifully designed! 10 from me!

Poetry is either something that lives like fire inside you or else it is nothing, an empty formalized bore around which pedants can endlessly drone their notes and explanations.

Unknown Source

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