Confused

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Confused

A darken soul has been mine for a time,
since the day I decided to speak only rhymes,
I see how I used to be and how I am now,
I never used to care about anything,
or at least I never knew how,
I smiled a fake smile when you came back into my life,
I placed the feelings away deep inside of myself inspite,
I always think of how you were back then,
and knew I could take time to fight the worries of when,
I realized suddenly that it was not going to end,
this is not going to stop,
its never going end,
something deep inside you caused my soul to curl and bend,
Something calls to my soul from the depths of the shadows of which I defend,
We fell apart but slowly became friends once again,
Sometimes I wonder if you see my true feelings I hide so deep within the sand,
Truly we say that we should only remain as best friends,
but really do you feel that the love we share is only for those that are "just" friends?
You confuse me so much with the riddles and songs,
I can only get more confused when its turned around all for a cause,
Sometimes I wonder of things that should of been or could of been,
but no matter how hard I try to hide I know deep inside it depends,
I cannot forget how much love I truly have for you,
And I cannot forget the lessons I had to learn because of you,
you have been there for me when all ignored the pain,
you have been there for me when all others ran away,
Somtimes I wonder if things could be true,
or that maybe I'm lying to myself,
thinking that I "could" have you,
I hide all the feelings deep inside of the emptiness of my heart,
I keep them locked away, shadowing the darkest corners of my mind,
I wonder why sometimes we pretend to be like this,
maybe because we want to believe that we are meant to be what we think is,
just know that my heart is missing something,
perhaps it is only you, that can be the true hero that I need.

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Poetry is either something that lives like fire inside you or else it is nothing, an empty formalized bore around which pedants can endlessly drone their notes and explanations.

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BeeJaiJaqui’s Poems (103)

Title Comments
Title Comments
Just A Game 0
Happy Birthday, Favorite! 0
Real Feelings 0
Hurting 0
Only Human 0
Returning Family 0
Only Be A Friend 0
A Birthday Wish For A Special Person 0
No Longer Happy 0
Keeping -You- Safe 0
My Angel 0
Confused 0
Can't Stop... 0
Within Turmoil 0
Defiance 0
Things 0
Opening Up 0
My Apology... 0
Why Am I....? 0
The Hidden Fear... 0
Memories and Dreams, Hopes And Things. 2
Dark Raven 1
Today Is Real 0
Loved and Lost 0
Loosing Hope 0
Thoughts 0
My Hero 1
Time and His Love 1
I Look.... 0
Forever My Sisters 0
Always and Forever 1
You Took Everything 1
Farewell To Him 0
Love Forever 1
Three Gone 0
I Love You More 0
When Two Hearts Meet 0
One Last Time 0
No More Happiness 0
Dark Guardian Angel 0
Letting Go 0
I Am 0
Darkness is Here 0
Your Last Breath 0
Your Choices 0
You're My Friend 1
You WIll Never Be Forgotten 0
You Will Be Hurt -2
You Will Always Use Me 0
You Only Get One Chance 0
You Look At Me 2
You Are Missed 0
Without You 0
Why 1
When You Go Home 0
When We Were Tight 0
Whatever Happens 0
What I May Be 0
We Miss You 0
To Be 0
Time 0
The Way You Hurt Me 0
The Three I Lost 1
The Lost Child In Me 1
The Life of an O.G. 2
The Life I Share 0
The Last Good-Bye 0
The Last Chance 0
The Final Good-Bye 0
Something's On My Mind 0
Running Away 2
Pain TOO Great 1
Our Love 0
One Day At A Time 0
My Sister 0
My Love For You 0
My Love 0
My Little Friend 1
My Life 0
My First, My Last 0
My 1 True Friend 0
My #1 Best Friend 0
My Favorite Cousin 0
Just One More GOD 1
It's Time 0
I'm Not A Girl 2
I Remember... 0
I Knew and Still 0
Here One Day, Gone The Next 0
Gone With HE 0
GOD and Sun 0
Forget What Was Said 0
Forever 0
Empty Spaces 0
Cousins 4 Life 0
Class of 2005 0
Changes 0
Betrayer 0
August 29, 2002 0
As The Days Past By 0
Am I In Love? 1
Always, Never 0
A Wish To Be A Cat 3