Cranium

6 Comments

Poem Commentary

Me think i'm a little board. Back to work tomorrow. TG

Cranium

I’m a blank canvas

Burning at the door

My thoughts are voluminous

Countless

They're storming at my door

Smoldering

A crying flame

Knock Knocking

A painted picture

A canvas

On my

Cranium

Door

 

Poem Comments

(6)

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Jasinful commented on Cranium

04-22-2010

Love this poem. How well you have put into words for me, the confusion we sometimes have at what we are thinking and feeling. Great visualization!!

bluskyinthenite

04/22/2010

thank you very much for reading my poem. I find my self confused many a time. Confusion is my middle name. Thanks again.

devaamido commented on Cranium

04-12-2010

What you need is a regular meditation practice. LOL.

bluskyinthenite

04/12/2010

he he he Yes i do at that.

knight4696 commented on Cranium

04-10-2010

Blue - A very interesting write my friend. I love the metaphors ... You certainly say a lot in very few words! Nice Job! :) Ken

bluskyinthenite

04/10/2010

Getting into poetry more so each day. .

Teardrops commented on Cranium

04-09-2010

you see all kinds of picture bombing the mind at once great write thanks Marie

bluskyinthenite

04/10/2010

Good Morning Marie. thanks for reading. I dont want to go to work..

RHPeat commented on Cranium

04-09-2010

Blusky// Nice metaphorical piece. I think you want "they're" in this line. (There storming at my door), but I'm not sure. I might say "knock-knocking" in L8. just for the rhythm. I think it would run together with "a painted picture" a bit better. Try it and see what it sounds like to you. It is quite interesting how you have tied all the concrete images together. Well done. A poet friend. RH Peat

bluskyinthenite

05/02/2010

Thank you for the suggestion. I changed it. It flow well

RHPeat

05/02/2010

You might want to look at my notes on the poetry school forum boards in the thread "working toward the sonnet" There is a lot of good general information there when it comes to just writing free verse. A poet friend// RH Peat

Poetry is what is lost in translation.

Robert Frost (1875-1963) American Poet.

bluskyinthenite’s Poems (60)

Title Comments
Title Comments
Enthusiasm Fading 4
Sorry is a empty word 6
Invisible 5
Break 2
Take Flight 4
Searching for my mojo 1
Nature 8
Imagine 2
Nodin's blowing 2
Sons Poem 3
Son's Poem 3
Mobile Cell phone 2
Rock me baby 5
Nebie know more 4
"this trash barrel is still on fire" 4
Total Eclipse 5
Earth's satellite 6
Memorial Day Weekend ~Fatality~ 7
You Don't know Me 9
Drive By 9
re: son's poem 3
RE: sons poems 1
Evolution Distruction 3
Nova 2
Twinkle In His Eye's 2
Put on hold 3
Shadow maker under me 2
Crying a River of Pain 5
Cause and effect 2
regretful sorrow 2nd 2
Shards of ice pierce my heart 4
regretful sorrow 6
the chambers of insecurity 4
I'm to blame for this 2
Into the Universe 2
Memories of contentment 2
Meticulous Imperfection 3
Storms a brewing 5
My mental turmoil my madness 3
Sands of Time 3
Narcissus 3
Steed of Steel 2
Cranium 6
Life is Poetry 4
Looking Glass 3
Broken Wings 3
Lost 2
Echo's threw my mind 1
Lazy cold cold day and here ai " Sitting here looking like this!" 1
Rest 1
Lost in the Mind 2
Love Lost 1
Cant seem to make it flow. "Insane in the brain" 2
Jalapeno Sub 3
No regrets 4
Stair master 1
Lonely for your touch 2
Rain on the Roof 2
Life’s small struggles 3
Auto Pilot 2