Escaped

11 Comments

Poem Commentary

This is about a troubled person who chooses drugs over reality. It is done from the point of few of the drug addict. I am putting myself in his place and telling it in the third person.

Escaped

He’s splitting from this scene

A one way trip out of here

Won’t miss cold hearted people

Nor a putrid stench in the air

 

Follow him on his escape

Breaking free of Earth’s atmosphere

Leaving a chilled, lonely place

To a place where he won’t have to care

 

Jettisoned past a lonely moon

Pocked with crests, craters, and bowls

Moon faces a blue planet

Moans about never met goals

 

Pulled past a red planet

Compelled by a bright, ringed one

Strewn of lime washed colors

Angel’s halo surrounding a new Eden

 

Certain the rings will provide

Peace he’s desperate to find

World of promises broken

Glad to have left it behind

 

A cold and quiet voyage

His friend the nothingness of space

Comforted by a full flask

And a gun brought along just in case

 

A long journey made in time

Decades passed in a blink of an eye

He contemplated his solitude

Didn’t want you to see him cry

 

Nearing rings turn to icy rocks

Shards threaten to kill soon

Pulled and slung by boot heals

Landing on a cloudy, gray moon

 

Gasped and choked on poisoned air

Tossed around by murky sea

Biting cold burns fingers and toes

All he wanted was to be free

 

His pride won’t let him return

To a blue spec in the abyss

No longer bound by earthly ties

A life passing he surely will miss

Poem Comments

(11)

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ShadowEyes commented on Escaped

04-20-2011

I truly like the way you have written this poem. Good work.

MootPoint

04/21/2011

Thanks for commenting. :)

GenUWinePoet commented on Escaped

04-20-2011

it is well written - but i can tell you aren't in the zone. what i mean is - you don't write with the knowledge of an addict. I agree though with Kmooney - it does remind me of David Bowie.

MootPoint

04/21/2011

I can see that. I don't have first hand knowledge of being an addict, just the father of one.

kmooney commented on Escaped

09-25-2010

Kind of reminds of Space Oddity by David Bowie. I liked it. Again, it has a surreal feel to it. Nice rhyme scheme and cadence. You could almost make a song out of this. Are you a Pink Floyd fan by chance? Dark Side of the Moon? Read my poem The Paradox of Oz and see what you think. It's long but well worth the jouney. Thanks for sharing...Kevin.

MootPoint

09/27/2010

Yes, big Floyd fan here. Space Oddity is one of Bowie's greats. Thanks for the comment. -Moot

Artie commented on Escaped

07-09-2010

I really go into this. At first I thought the commentary was unnesessary, but as I read through, I saw so much to the story. This is a great piece - 10 from me

MootPoint

07/12/2010

Thank you Artie, Many meanings could have be taken from this poem. I just wanted people to know how I came to directing this one. Even with the comentary there is some mystery here. Hey thanks for the 10.

MarionYost commented on Escaped

06-21-2010

Oh my God! This Brought tears to my eyes. Wow. What a poem So sad. Hope the boy finds his way home for a happier ending.. Great poem All the best -Marion-

MootPoint

06/22/2010

Thank you Marion. We pray often for him to find his way out of that life.

Poetry is not an expression of the party line. It's that time of night, lying in bed, thinking what you really think, making the private world public, that's what the poet does.

Allen Ginsberg (1926-1997) U.S. poet.

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