haiku

7 Comments

haiku

a fog horn belches
echoing into our dreams
of bowing birches

Poem Comments

(7)

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knight4696 commented on haiku

12-27-2009

Nice work here Bloomingsun. I am not a real fan of Haiku - but I am starting to understand their allure. So much said in so few words - there's something to be said for that. Again, Very nice work! .... Ken

bloomingsun

12/27/2009

Thank you; I have some difficulty with haiku... the extreme condensation is hard to do well. Thanks for reading!

Bettysrainbow48 commented on haiku

12-18-2009

This is a well put together little poem. Good Job.

bloomingsun

12/18/2009

Thanks Betty! I appreciate your visit and thanks for reading...

ginga commented on haiku

12-16-2009

bloomingsun, An interesting haiku that employs the b's and d's quite splendidly. ginga

bloomingsun

12/16/2009

thanks, I guess I didn't plan it that way, but you are right, lots of b's and d's, lol... thanks for reading!

kmooney commented on haiku

12-13-2009

Haikus are tough. I like what you've done here. Word choice is so important and with the limits one has, it's important not to waste any. I think a title should set the stage. Introduce the topic of subject. This piece does conjure up a somewhat mystical, poignant scene. I can picture myself standing on a dock in the early morning, at daybreak. The bowing birches suggesting a restlessness, as a distant storm approaches. A good offering. Thanks for sharing it... Kevin

bloomingsun

12/13/2009

A title, a-ha! I see how that would help. I have somehow missed that important piece of a haiku. Your advice is much appreciated, I will make note along with the other advice I have gotten and try again... thank you!

HarverTomsson commented on haiku

12-07-2009

In its purest form haiku's first line introduces the actor, or subject; the second, the action, and the third, the consequence or result: literal, symbolic, or emotional. I like this one, and want to play with it, sustituting "past" for "of". Good write.

bloomingsun

12/08/2009

Thanks Harver, I didn't know that about haiku, but am inspired to try it again with those guidelines...

bloomingsun

12/08/2009

different content, but another try at haiku... ash grey, the spider spinning, he waits expectant avarice destroyed

If I feel physically as if the top of my head were taken off, I know that is poetry.

Emily Dickinson (1830-1886) American poet.

bloomingsun’s Poems (29)

Title Comments
Title Comments
Spilling Light 2
Delivery 2
Gathering Light 9
Spring Haiku 2
Touchstone 5
Promises 1
Let Us See 4
Summary 3
Gift 7
Plea for Peace; a villanelle 7
Her Escape 16
Confession 7
Out of Our Hands 7
Child of Longing 6
Wait 5
Advent 13
haiku 7
Beach 8
Vows 4
Let Down Again 4
Just Thinking 3
Muse 3
Blossoms 3
The Power of a Flower 5
Heaven's Beach 8
Her Heart 2
Renewal 5
breaking 6
Morning on the Dock 9