Hopelessly Searching

I need to find something real, something true, for my life
Something to free me from my gratuitous inner strife
I'm fighting the suffering, which pierced as a knife
So sharp and devastating in the belly of this lowlife

But I don't know what to do or where I should turn
Because it would seem my desires would have me burn
Destroying all chances with everything for which I yearn
And slowly forging a new heart of rusted and frigid iron

I have no idea what to do with my awfully loving heart
Because no matter who I give it to it's always torn apart
The most awful thing is in how badly I wish I could restart
Such an action is always impossible, at least on my part

It seems that there's absolutely nothing I could ever do
To make myself become any closer to what I want from you
Or anyone else in the world, if this feeling is true
I'm scared it will be this way until I find some rescue

Until the day that I find what I'm looking for
I'll be left waiting and watching my own score
And sitting out an occasional teary eyed downpour
Endlessly, hopelessly searching for something more...