I WANNA DREAM - NEW POEM

3 Comments

Poem Commentary

copyright 2010 all rights reserved By Karma JUNE 16TH 2010 COMMENT !!!!!!!!

I WANNA DREAM - NEW POEM

I WANNA DREAM- WANNA DREAM.
SO BADLY...DREAM ABOUT THE THINGS THAT MAKE ME HAPPY.

I WANNA DREAM- WANNA DREAM.
NOW YOU GOT ME..I CAN ONLY MAKE ME HAPPY.

I'M SO HIGH ..SO FUCKING FREE.
YOU'D HAVE TO NAME A STAR RIGHT AFTER ME.

I'M SO GOOD I HAVE MY OWN SAFE HAVEN.
HOPEFULLY ITS YOUR HEART THAT I'M HOPEING IT'S WORTH TAKEN.

MAYBE SOME DAY I'LL BE READY TO SETTAL.
BUT UNTIL THEN I'M ASLEEP DREAMING AND ITS SOMETHING MENTAL.

DREAMING ABOUT A LIFE WORTH LIVEING.I GOTTA LOVE MY SELF.
1ST B4 I'M GIVEN.

DREAMING ABOUT LOVE...DREAMING MY FAMS..DREAMING ABOUT WHOS MY REAL FRIENDS.

WHO'S TEAM ME ...AND WHOS TEAM WHO?

IDK BUT ALL I'M SAYING TO YOU IS

I WANNA DREAM- WANNA DREAM.
SO BADLY...DREAM ABOUT THE THINGS THAT MAKE ME HAPPY.

I WANNA DREAM- WANNA DREAM.
NOW YOU GOT ME..I CAN ONLY MAKE ME HAPPY


copyright  2010   all rights reserved
By Karma


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ListninEar commented on I WANNA DREAM - NEW POEM

07-23-2010

I liked the first four stanza's of the poem...but then it started losing something for me. I'm not sure if it's cause of the whole spelling thing...but something started to turn me off to it. You got me back at the end though. I think I just don't like the whole "mental" thing there, but overall it's a nice piece of work. I'm gonna read more!

dahlusion commented on I WANNA DREAM - NEW POEM

07-20-2010

Dream on lovely goddess, your expression, the passion, the direction, is a voice all of your own. Bravo!! I agree with "devaamido" on the "cleaning up of your spelling". You are a part of a cell phone/text generation that is forgetting, or simply not learning, how to spell. Text message styling doesn't work in poetry, it falls short of producing emotion and imagery. Peace and Light, Dah

devaamido commented on I WANNA DREAM - NEW POEM

07-18-2010

Okay, here goes:Your best card is your courage to jump right into life, your pleasing energy, & the knack for expressing ho you feel. While you're learning, it's better to avoid street slang and cellphone abbreviations, irregular spelling & street slang are good when they're used to accent something about the poem. Otherwise it looks like you didn't know the difference. Start with cleaning that up & lots more will comment! Thanks

A poem begins as a lump in the throat, a sense of wrong, a homesickness, a lovesickness. It finds the thought and the thought finds the words.

Robert Frost (1875-1963) American Poet.

Karma885’s Poems (39)

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❥I AM THE MUZIC★ -NEW LYRICS JUNE 2011 0
NOSEY THE X-MAS DEER- NEW POEM 2010 1
IS IT IMPOSSIBLE-LY
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IM IN HELL-NEW LYRICS 1
Petrified- NEW POEM 0
HE LOVES MY SEX- LYRICS 1
YOU SAID- LYRICS 0
PRETTY LIL MAMA-LYRICS 0
SAVE ME NOW-LYRICS 0
THE LONELIEST MAN IN THE WORLD-LYRICS 0
IS IT IMPOSSIBLE?- NEW SONG 0
HE LOVES MY SEX - NEW SONG 2
I WANNA DREAM - NEW POEM 3
MY LORD KNOWS- NEW POEM 10
NEW SONG!!!- Life is like a song (you just gotta write the lyrics) 8
WHY IS LOVE SO TIRED 2010- POEM 4
SOULMATE I NEVER MET 2010-POEM 2
SO DAMN SWEET - NEW LYRICS' 3
DICK HUNGERY- NEW RAP LYRIC'S 3
SHALL I HAVE YOU?- NEW POEM 5
For I Am Cleopatra 14
Poision Butterfly NEW POEM 12
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Love's Good Side- lyrics 3
FREEDOME WRITER 3
CLOSED EYE'S- NEW POEM 17
LUST XxX RATED POEM - 11
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10 THINGS I HATE ABOUT BEING A WOMEN. 17
P.S. ROMEO FUCK YOU!!!! 13
Alice In Wounder Land 14
Marijuana, 16
Pandoras box 9
MENT TO BE 11
RATHER BE IN HEAVEN 15
P.M.S/ I'LL KICK YOUR ASS 16
a womens Mystery 16
THE LADY IN THE MASK....... 15
When love used to make me feel 10 feet tall 18