I'll Always Be a Monster

I look in the mirror and think about what my friends say.(I'm hot,beautiful,sexy,amazing,different,one of a kind,specail,cute,perfect)
But if this is true.
Why do I see a monster?
Why do I have no heart?
I don't understand.
Maybe they lie or maybe they don't see.
Maybe its just me.
I lay on this cold floor.
Thinking about how much pain and heartach I've been through.
The tears pour out of my eyes.
Everyone of them holding a memory of pain.
I remember everything.
I pick up my pen writing it all down.
Everything written on those simple white lined paper.
I get off the floor.
I grab a box of matches as I walk through my fornt door.
I light the match setting the paper on fire.
Letting the memories,the words of suffering burn away.
Burn away from my mind.
But as I walk back towards the mirror.
I see the monster I will always be.
Weither they see it or not.
It will always remain.