In Time

4 Comments

Poem Commentary

Well, I'm not very good at happy poems, but a tune was stuck in my head.... Perhaps I should rearrange the third and fourth stanzas? Switch them? Oh, well.

In Time

With every shift of the minute hand
There's less time to say what needs to be said
River beds running red will soon be dry
Lifting heads to the eternal sky

Here's a song! Raise your voice! Let me hear you sing
Laughing loud, I'm glad to have you here with me
With you it's too fun not to run under golden sun
C'mon, there's no haste - let us face the day that just begun

With every shift of the minute hand
There's less time, can't flip back the hour's sand
Windy gales whisper still, but for how long?
It doesn't take much for things to go all wrong

There's a beat! Move your feet! Won't you dance with me?
So soon, hearts in tune, are you listening?
If this is a dream, let me be, don't wake me please
I've just learned how to get off of my knees

The skies are growing darker now, day by day
I know that life won't always go my way
Our time may have ended, but I'll always treasure
The many memories of minutes we spent together
'Cause with every shift of the minute hand
It's that much closer 'til we meet again
So I'll wait until late by our favorite shore
Until everything goes and flows like it did before

Poem Comments

(4)

Please login or register

You must be logged in or register a new account in order to
leave comments/feedback and rate this poem.

Login or Register

optimistic commented on In Time

12-23-2010

Very passionate write great way to put the way the world will turn in a days time

Franziska commented on In Time

10-16-2010

I like this poem! Mostly I'm all for doom and gloom, but you did very well for a happy poem. I have to admit I wasn't paying attention to you when you read this out loud to me *nervous hehe*

DeepEclipse commented on In Time

07-19-2010

I like the way it rhymes. Sometimes rhyming multiple times in one line. Nice. The first, third and last stanza seem to reflect somewhat of a gain, then leading to a loss, then coming to an acceptance. Full circle. How I saw it anyway. Enjoyed the read.

When power leads man towards arrogance, poetry reminds him of his limitations. When power narrows the area of man's concern, poetry reminds him of the richness and diversity of existence. When power corrupts, poetry cleanses.

John F. Kennedy (1917-1963) Thirty-fifth President of the USA

smaffa’s Poems (33)

Title Comments
Title Comments
Hope Heart-Killer 0
Dream Unto Eternity 1
The Little Rat 0
Bad Weather 3
Go Die, Please 2
By His Side 2
Dreamer 3
Farewell Letter 1
Ascent 1
Descent 1
Life in the Gutter 0
The Hunt 1
Hunter 0
Phantom 1
A Reason 2
AnnEx 1
Summer Day 3
Hell Ride 3
K.I.A. 2
Li La Loo 1
In Time 4
Faulted Heart 3
Vengence 3
Child of Mine 3
Wishing Upon an Angel's Wing 2
Transience 2
Black Widow 2
Night Stalker 3
One Phrase 2
I Can Cry Too 2
Hearts of War 2
Broken Bond 3
Forgotten Land 2