Strangeness
straight to the gut
thanks for the input
alone in this isolation chamber
otherwise known as a tomb,
masquerading as a bedroom

Relating to these words
that release in chaotic blurbs
sometimes feeling quite disturbed
how life always seems to throw a curve
Writing it down
recording it all
no matter how wrong
or pointedly perturbed
it may portray,
There is blood on these hands today

Do these words carry any weight?
can one feel love
weighed down by such blatant hate?
Maybe that isn't the right word
or the correct emotion
to express this devotion
of staring into a void
trying desperately to avoid 
breathing in this ocean
heading downward,
like some sinking stone
forgotten by everyone
in the dark all alone 

Prick the sun
blot out these rays
that are hell bent
on lightening my hair
and destroying these retinas
with spotty after images
of scenery that was never quite there
Blink man, blink
like an old fashioned movie
on a flickering reel
threaded through a projector
like the ones used to see
in 1975, at Lincoln Elementary
which is now a center
for Downs Syndrome
So a piece of childhood
is lost forever
and the memories fade
nothing seems remarkable
or even impressionable anymore

Wandering lost
in between what might have been
countless enemies, faceless friends
Experimentation
you can be the driver now
take the wheel
onto the next great reveal
never quite remembering
how it once used to feel

What do you say to people
who have been absent for 25 years?
Maybe there was a reason
they walked away
an underlining suspicion
forcing circles into squares
Mid life crisis
'At least you've got your health'
Sadly, that's the next thing to go
and so yet another lament arises
from the ashes of,'might have been'
Lost in this reality
never once having a dream

mathiasthom
written 6/11/10