My life - a game - such a cruel mean joke,
to think my one chance has boiled down to this.
The sadness - sins and pain - the extremes,
I laugh to myself; life can be so mean.
To have had such a place that I came back from,
only to reenter the gates I thought were sealed.;
re-walking those steps, refacing those fears,
bleeding over again, reliving those years.
Knowledge is nothing more than a mental illusion,
choices are made based upon what you THINK you know;
yet here I am - where I don't want to be,
blinded to what all others can see.
Self inflicted some might say,
yet everyone represses the darkness I become;
you run from yours, I chose to embrace mine,
we all fall suit; its just a matter of time.
You like to judge from behind your million masks,
denying the fact you are anything but right.
Oh but your ignorance will one day fade,
and you will face the monster you held at bay.
My pitiful life, you like to say;
Wasted - such a shame - I turned out this way.
Hearing your lies, whispers, doubts,
criticizing, punishing me for being myself.
Cutting me more, your words I can live without.
I do bad on my own, I don't need you help.
Battling my demons, from sun up to my eye close,
fighting a war from within, a world you repulse;
I lay down with myself, and inside I'm numb;
When embracing the darkness I have become.