Once I Had an Outie

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  • Humor

    Poem Commentary

    A post at a friend's request who wants to see me publically humiliated for her having to keep buying me "nice pants" of a skosh larger size.

    Once I Had an Outie



    Once I had an outie
     Where ol’ Doc had finished cuttin’;

    That nubbin left right in my middle

    That’s called my belly button.

    Once I had an outie

    My body lithe and trim;

    In childlike innocence I ate to grow,

    My torso straight and slim.

    Once I had an outie

    Not minding fat from thin,

    Until one day my wide eyes dropped

    To see my outie- headed in!

    I thought about that outie

    Each time I toweled dry,

    Then dressed, intent to hide the dent

    From any prying eye.

    I soon learned the terms

    For buttons once thought skinny:

    A priv’leg’d few still have a flatty,

    But mine’s an outright innie.

    Years have passed since I last classed

    My naval headed in,

    So many feasts have been enjoyed

    Just where should I begin?

    My shirts keep gettin’ bigger

    To clothe my growing form;

    Yet, as I look around me

    It seems to be the norm.

    Adults don’t talk of belly buttons

    Except the ones on kids;

    They chat of chins, and chests, and rumps,

    And other parts on skids.

    But, once I had an outie

    A belly button smart;

    Yet now I am an outie

    And it’s just the belly part!

    So kids sit up and listen

    And if you can, relate;

    And care for your own belly button

    Before it is too late.


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    FranzJ commented on Once I Had an Outie

    01-08-2011

    cute, funny and all to true - the Doctor told me I have a furinture desise- my chest done droped into my drawes

    HarverTomsson

    01/08/2011

    That was the part on skids.LOL Harv

    ginga commented on Once I Had an Outie

    01-07-2011

    Harver, A hilarious poem of a body part that gets covered up once you're over 45. LOL! ginga

    HarverTomsson

    01/07/2011

    Well, I wuz thinkin about the nubbin: the Doc left right in the middle, and I was hooked. I had to write the whole poem! Harv

    Hampton commented on Once I Had an Outie

    01-06-2011

    Innie or outie, which ever course your palate takes you. Just remember that your tailor is the guy who must ultimately remake you. Great write.

    HarverTomsson

    01/06/2011

    Haha, glad you enjoyed this little bit of doggerel. Harv

    carynontherhine commented on Once I Had an Outie

    01-04-2011

    Oh Harvy, you just kill me with the imagination you so possess. You have made me laugh and giggle like a school girl once more at times because your poems can be so enchanting, adorable and comical. Then at other times they can be quite the reverse. Never known any poet like you. You are so special! Hugz

    HarverTomsson

    01/04/2011

    Sacré bleu! What more can I say? Harv

    tenderpoison commented on Once I Had an Outie

    01-04-2011

    lol..fun ride first thing in the morning - your wordplay is infectious :)

    HarverTomsson

    01/04/2011

    I was reluctant to display this bit of doggerel, but my mate was curious how it would be received here. Glad you enjoyed the whimsy. Harv

    Poetry is either something that lives like fire inside you or else it is nothing, an empty formalized bore around which pedants can endlessly drone their notes and explanations.

    Unknown Source

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