position

8 Comments

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  • Love

    Poem Commentary

    sometimes it's what in front of you.

    position

    <>





    she stood there in my kitchen
    hands on her hips, giving me the business
    i paused among the dishes
    as her words sharp with scissor precision
    slashed at my soul but i am uncut
    she pushed me, she pinched me
    trying to convince me
    that i am wrong
    but all i could see was her blue eyes
    and how the overhead light created a halo
    a sensual and sweet glow
    upon her beautiful blond hair

    she stood there in my kitchen
    full of fire
    attired in anger
    my mad girl 
    but somewhere i smile inside










    3wT



    Poem Comments

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    MindNumbing commented on position

    01-26-2011

    Oh!! I LOVE this one!! This takes all of our womenly power and shifts it to a completely different level that most of us probably don't even know we have! The greatest thing is, it doesn't strip us of that power... it feeds it. PERFECTLY written, with outstanding visuals. Thanks so much for posting!

    Phission

    01/26/2011

    women have complete power over most things when it comes to men ( at least over me ). i love you all, mad, sad, glad or even suicidal....i just love women and how they make my world go around. i mean no direspect with my comment. thank you !

    ginga commented on position

    01-11-2011

    phission, I like this one alot...the joke's on her yet you adore her. Great love poetry here. ginga

    Phission

    01/11/2011

    thank you, ginga.....you are a MONSTAH talent !

    Balladeer commented on position

    01-10-2011

    Oh, yes...absolutely. You paint a great scenario here...the lady ranting and raving and the fellow only seeing the beauty. THAT is keying in on the important things in life and you paint that thought very well.

    dancinghawk commented on position

    01-09-2011

    yeah ... love this bit of wordplay and feisty-ness ... nice flow, rap-like, definitely "hear" this in my head, staccato, NICE ... and a window on nearly any kitchen in america, lol ... -dh

    Phission

    01/09/2011

    hahaha...yes, mate. thanks for your time. most appreciated !

    MrGee commented on position

    01-09-2011

    Interesting poem. sThe final stanza captured my attention,however,the first stanza seemed to lack good meter.

    Phission

    01/09/2011

    thank you for your constructive critcism and your time.

    The true philosopher and the true poet are one, and a beauty, which is truth, and a truth, which is beauty, is the aim of both.

    Ralph Waldo Emerson, American Poet (1803-1882)

    Phission’s Poems (24)

    Title Comments
    Title Comments
    hands 1
    freight rain 2
    goodbye 8
    sensual central 1
    goodnight, summer night 3
    the robin 2
    gun 4
    top of the sky 2
    eulogy 2
    do you love me 3
    i lost her 4
    home 2
    observations in random rows 3
    these days 1
    music and dreams 3
    point blank 5
    the gift 2
    breathing love 6
    position 8
    name 5
    one 3
    companion 2
    beware 4
    this ( for annie ) 3