Pristine Dawn

6 Comments

Poem Commentary

This poem meant to be read after my first poem, "Starry Night", it tells the story of how young love is not comparable to the night, which is the center of the first poem, but rather young love is the dawn, mysterious and new, and the creatures awakened in the poem are meant to be the emotions that are stirred by love. Not my best work, but it was intended for a special someone nonetheless.

Pristine Dawn

Could it be that I was wrong, last I wrote?

Of love compared to the eve, I had spoke.

 This passion isn’t the night, from my last note.

Let me fix this now by pen's graceful stroke

 

Darkness beaten back by the rising sun.

A formless world captures imagination.

Swirling mists veil truths of the day just begun,

Hazed light filters down the powers of creation.

 

 Newborn dawn, brings to life those slumbering.

Awakening things from the deepest depths.

Enthused creatures rise and commence singing.

Inspired by their song, day now begins.

 

You see, the morn, pristine and mysterious,

It is our young love, the morn, it is us.

Poem Comments

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DaleLinc commented on Pristine Dawn

09-28-2009

Thank you for sharing this truly beautiful work. It shows the creative depth of your young heart.

Tray4 commented on Pristine Dawn

09-19-2009

I really like this one it was the best one i have read soo far great job!!!!!!

symmetry commented on Pristine Dawn

09-18-2009

Inspired by this poem, my day now begins. This was wonderful

Chrisjan commented on Pristine Dawn

09-06-2009

A very well written poem. A lot of good imagary throughout this awesome work of art. Very creative. Thanks for sharing.

NevillePark commented on Pristine Dawn

09-02-2009

You show great potential in the way you reach for the visceral nuggets out there. Watch your meter. Work on keeping everything in rhythm from one verse to the next. and write write write. suggest - V1-L2 ... Love compared to an eve of which I spoke. Maybe you can compare an evening with love but you might want to see if a word other than "compared" better suits the intent in the sentence.

The true philosopher and the true poet are one, and a beauty, which is truth, and a truth, which is beauty, is the aim of both.

Ralph Waldo Emerson, American Poet (1803-1882)

quickwrite’s Poems (13)

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Friend 4
Starry Canopy 9
Pristine Dawn 6