Remembering the past

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Remembering the past

Remember the past
and looking at it with great amuse
we had fun together
and it was a blast
we would sit and watch tv
you would rock me to sleep when i had a bad dream
you taught me to cook
and taught me how to read my first book.

In febuary of 2001
that is when everything turned upside down
dad got a call early in the morning saying that you went in to cardiac arrest
so dad and lorraine rushed to your side
Time went by and i didnt hear anything so i thought you were fine
but while i was in english class waiting for the bell to ring cause 
I was going to my friends house that night to get ready for a dance
over the intercome i heard my name and the person behind it said
"Erin will be picked up by her father after school so dont take the bus"
I wondered why but didnt ask any questions.
while i was waiting my teacher came up to me and said
"im sorry about your mother"
I didnt know at the time what he ment so i just said thank you
Then i saw your car "the white whale" pull up 
I opened the door and that is when i noticed dad, lorraine and april crying
i hit me like a bat out of hell right then and there that you werent ok
That you had passed 
My heart fell to my knees and at that moment 
I didnt feel like i had a reason to live
we got home i went into my room and just cryed
then i got called out and my father said that he wanted me to go to the dance that night because that is what you would have wanted
i didnt feel like i should have but for you i did

Your funeral came along and i was trying so hard not to cry
but then dad got up and said something to the crowd of people there
and i just couldnt hold the tears in anymore 
while sitting there in the pue i realized i lost one of my best friends
It hurt so bad that i wasnt there the last time you took your last breath
i wish i was but i knew deep down in side you rather have had me not see it 
cause it would have hurt me more

After i calmed down a little bit 
I told myself that you would always be with me 
and you will always be apart of me
You were a wonderful person mom
I love you and miss you
and i hope to see you in heaven. 

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In science one tries to tell people, in such a way as to be understood by everyone, something that no one ever knew before. But in poetry, it's the exact opposite.

Franz Kafka (1883-1924) Czech writer.

erin6489’s Poems (16)

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