the complexities of depression...

4 Comments

the complexities of depression...

sorry i cant be who im supposed to be...
staring through pain and misery...
maybe i should just shut myself down...
erase the pain from my face to lessen the frown...


maybe i should just build a new mask
forge it from steel instead of from glass
then i wont have to worry about cracks
or having it shatter when my emotions attack


maybe these will be the last words i write
because of the pain that they bring into everyones lives
the hurt that it causes when reading these lines
including the pain that is brings into mine


i know words can cut and drive spikes into veins
slice up the heart until nothing remains
rip through the mind devouring the brain
hoping to heal but bringing more pain


im sorry i cant just smile at will
that the look on my face sometimes says kill
i cant just make up my mind to heal
by flipping a switch or taking a pill


i know that is seems that my thoughts always race
and i cannot control the look on my face
i cant break from the dark where i feel im encased
strangeling my heart and smothering my brain

 

i know that it seems that moods never change
always the exact same look on my face
no one should think that i want to remain
under this cloud and surrounded by pain


i wish it was easy to just turn it all off
wipe off the frown the tears and the scoff
but if i must ill just put on this mask
and say im ok whenever anyone asks


 

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Tinytree commented on the complexities of depression...

02-24-2010

I think mant of us can relate. You are not alone. You have said it very well. I am waiting to read what you purge.

Dano

02/24/2010

ty you tiny... i am purging and getting ready to post something new...

earthly commented on the complexities of depression...

02-24-2010

you said it-I paint a smile on my face to hide my depression-those close to me feel my misery-depression sux...Earthly

Dano

02/24/2010

thank you for taking the time to read...

BringMeBullets commented on the complexities of depression...

02-19-2010

Being depressed is so hard. And people don't know what it's like unless they've experienced it. Anyway can say "just get over it." But the hardest part is putting those words into actions. I admire that you can write so deeply about the subject. I've suffered from depression for most of my life, and it's hard. Very hard. But for me, writing has always made it better. It's a way out, an escape. A blank page is not judgmental. Thank god for that. Great write. It touched me deeply. Thank you for sharing.

Tempy commented on the complexities of depression...

01-29-2010

im sorry i cant just smile at will that the look on my face sometimes says kill i cant just make up my mind to heal by flipping a switch or taking a pill ..... You so know what I'm saying when the expressions seem to push through leaving pain for truthful moments that seem to slip in unaware... I Need to get a mask and get it insured... against damage causes from mask malfunctions, when it seems to give way to the true faces feelings in a room where thats not the answer they require or expect... great write. yeah you so get it..

Poetry is finer and more philosophical than history; for poetry expresses the universal, and history only the particular.

Aristotle (384 BC-322 BC) Greek philosopher.

Dano’s Poems (150)

Title Comments
Title Comments
from an angels view 19
searching the darkness 10
a letter from santa 14
thanksgiving (acrostic) 12
the depth of... 11
ive wished 7
absentee 12
this is... 13
a journey into the dark 7
the cold of november 14
your voice 12
the yin to the yang 14
twisted 9
autumn 14
i think it happened again 11
luna~tic 19
the darkness 13
a blinding eclipse 16
the universe... 18
the wind of sorrow 14
my sorrow weeps 16
where but the dark... 12
immortal kiss 47
in a darkened room 17
our mother 7
within these flames 12
nocturnal (acrostic) classic rock 7
behind wrought iron bars 25
what i write (part 2) 8
today 17
the world in grey 6
the reality of... 5
in the shadow of a mountain 6
nothing will ever be the same 10
of cemetary dreams (and nightmare scapes) 12
next to a bed... 18
but... 15
at a funeral 12
seventeen (acrostic) 11
the fortunate one(s) 7
what did i do... 24
ashes to dust 45
dancing in the moonlight 14
disempowering the pain 14
the butterfly 10
what i write 14
sorry (i killed the after glow) 11
the humidity rises (an erotic tale) 9
pieces of light 8
the sad pumpkin &... 9
my face 12
for a long time... 14
(an explination of) distractions 6
tell me... 6
the charelston cookie tin 9
silent self destruction 8
exposed 13
the means of the day (a true valentines poem) 2
a poem about nothing... 8
blood bleeds black 7
dissecting myself 3
i will be just fine 3
the stacking of bricks 3
the complexities of depression... 4
spirits & ghosts 3
**random chaos** 2
bloodlust 3
...somethings missing... 2
15 years... 3
beauty sleeps entombed (parts 1 & 2) 3
**untitled** 2
the overstuffed closet 3
the candy dish 2
anxiety speaks 2
**untitled** 2
myself and the light 6
the fog 2
fire and tears 3
cerebral meltdown 3
sometimes i wish... 1
drawing strength from a starr... 2
disappointmen
t...
1
**untitled** 1
the flower garden 3
nature... 1
reaching out 2
the dark and the light... 1
the insistent demon 2
sorry... 3
forgive me lover... (parts 1 & 2) 2
im so sorry... 3
**no title... just random thoughts** 1
to eternity... 2
winter wind whips... 1
tired 2
lucid dream 1
the rains came... 2
the mourning light 1
another jagged pill 1
i just cant... 1
entitlement?!
?!?
1
entitlement!!
!!
1
burning within 4
inside of me 1
projected pain 1
the night... the dakness & the truth? 1
panic 2
the mourning fog 1
when the fires burn 1
through the night 1
shadow casts 0
a mournful rain 1
i cant protect me 2
my comfort place 0
an echo shifts 1
the monster 2
welcome to my life 0
the past is alive... 1
... 1
standing on the edge 2
my smile... 1
anxiety 2
my reality 0
another view... 0
untitled... 0
jagged pill 2
in the dark 1
what to do 1
how can i... 1
life... 3
a crust of pain 1
keeping me weak... 2
my dark world 3
another night of wondering 2
in the attic 4
i hold most dear 2
the me inside of me 2
another day 1
dreamed in a dream 2
a year in the life (dealing with death) 1
i look... 1
where my secrets are kept 1
a mouthful of words 2
i will not fear (when my eyes are blind) 2
i am aware (i'm already dead) 7
standing in the silence of my own shadow... 3
a blinding dark 1
growing pain 3
the longest of nights 5
... 7