The Mask Of Fear And Doubt

13 Comments

Poem Commentary

I have a whole storyline planned out for this. I just need the time to write it.

The Mask Of Fear And Doubt

There he knelt
in the middle of the smoke filled room
the fire spreading quickly
the sound of sirens in the distance
slowly getting louder sealing his demise
Blood in pools on the floor all around him
lifeless bodies litter the room

He quietly gazes
looking down at the gun in his hand
The object that shattered his childhood
and transformed his fairy tale life
into the vengence filled journey
that spanned 11 years

A slight smile comes to his face
as he remembers a time in his life
before he knew hate
before he knew vengence
before this mask became his true face
before the world was on fire




I remember now...


a time of laughter
a time of light
when mom had dinner on the table
and dad came home from work each night

he'd take off his badge
and hand it to me
So proud of him
I would polish it for hours
handling it so carefully

He was a man of honor
who stood for what he believed
but guys like him had a number
and his was called way too early

they came late, and silent
in the middle of the night
I heard the shots, the screams
and hid under the bed
until the end of the fight

I was afraid to move
all I could do was cry
then my bedroom door opened
and blood soaked feet
walked to my bedside

It was not my mother or my father
then he dropped to his knees
thrusting his arm under the bed
grabbing at me

I screamed and yelled
I tried to fight
he dragged me out
I was bound and gagged
and stolen away, into the night

 

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rsalassi commented on The Mask Of Fear And Doubt

09-02-2010

I can't believe I never came across this before. This is truly a powerful write, my friend, Almost a marriage between Capote and Dickens, with a little Robert Louis Stevenson thrown in. Great story.

danmartyjake1 commented on The Mask Of Fear And Doubt

04-18-2010

Speechless! I felt the words of this terrible account deeply. I felt like that child. You spin your words very masterfully.

MarionYost commented on The Mask Of Fear And Doubt

04-01-2010

wow, the emotion in this is conveyed perfectly and it displays very vivid imagery. Nice Job.. Another 10 (But, I'm not surprised.) All the best -Marion-

Chaos128 commented on The Mask Of Fear And Doubt

03-20-2010

I always get a kick out of flashbacks, I got a soft spot for cliffhangers, too. Leave it to Artie to provide two for the price of one ha ha. Needless to say I'm posted for the for the climax. This is gonna be good! ha ha

SavVySam commented on The Mask Of Fear And Doubt

03-19-2010

OMG! Terrifying! I am hooked already...waiting with baited breath until I can read the next segment! This really is good Artie! Let me know when you pen the next part!

In science one tries to tell people, in such a way as to be understood by everyone, something that no one ever knew before. But in poetry, it's the exact opposite.

Franz Kafka (1883-1924) Czech writer.

Artie’s Poems (71)

Title Comments
Title Comments
Fireflies 1
My Final Prayer 1
A Whisper Behind The Scream 3
She 2
Miss You 1
Speechless 1
Clarity 2
Believe 3
The Song Of My Life 2
A Piece Of Me (2012) 5
The Children Of The Night 5
House Of Cards 2
A Journey To The Surface 3
Until Next Time 2
Sinister 2
One Life 3
Irreverent Pleasures 19
Prelude To A Nightmare 23
Scratching The Surface 27
Conundrum 19
Defeated 33
The Blood Of The Poet 35
Beyond The Looking Glass 24
Embraced 22
The Night Of Eternal Light 18
The Forbidden Fruit 19
The Creator Of Tomorrow 15
The Band Played On 16
Mortal Memories, Immortal Thoughts 22
Fade 23
Unfinished & Untitled 16
The Machine 16
Instrument 20
Beyond My Grasp 26
The Day I Lost Aim 17
Cyclone 18
I Await 52
A Decade Of Stone 18
#1 20
The Mask Of Fear And Doubt 13
...they don't exist 12
A Breath Of Air 16
More Of You 18
Hostage 10
Soulless Solace 14
Power Outage 15
Why I Believe 23
Duet 21
Forever Unfinished 28
Gravity 24
Cosmic Smoke 46
Surviving The Storm 36
Feed 29
Everyday 23
Reborn 35
Overcome 35
Hmmm... 28
What Does This Mean To You? 31
The Beacon Ignited 18
Purify 25
Endless 12
One Moment In Time 30
A Peek Inside 28
A Piece Of Me 20
The Ocean 26
A Beacon Of Light 27
1987 26
A Cold Future 15
The Child Who Could Fly 43
Your Path 20
The First Thoughts Of Love 28