Winter's fading light

5 Comments

Winter's fading light

Winter's fading light-

Grandma's memories search my

unfamiliar smile.

Poem Comments

(5)

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danmartyjake1 commented on Winter's fading light

02-23-2011

Haunting and beautiful, about a sweet spirit that stays with you.

aw3haiku

02/23/2011

very nice. TY

RHPeat commented on Winter's fading light

02-14-2011

Nice poem. Very Senryu like. I'm not sure the word "fading" is needed. A poet friend/ RH Peat

aw3haiku

02/14/2011

good eye, RH. I wrote this one when young. the word choice forced the correct form then, though it would be more powerful without. Or with another wor to better represent that sense of loss of light, of memory. on grasp on the day and of life...

gmcookie commented on Winter's fading light

02-12-2011

Amos, Well this brings back memories of my own Grandma Nellie. She raised 12 kids of her own on a farm in Kansas, then raised my brother and me from the time I was 2 until I was 6. When she was on her death bed she kept calling out for me although I hadn't seen her for 15 years. I wound up in the foster care system, then in the Army in Vietnam, then out on the West Coast trying to recover from from the war. When I heard she was passing I immediately flew back to Great Bend and rushed to the hospital. She was there in bed, tubes and all. She hadn't recognized any of her children or grandchildren for days... But as soon as I entered the room with my beard and long hair she said "Glenn? Is that you Glenn?" I went to her side and took her hand. She looked up at me and said "Isn't that the prettiest gingham dress?". Then the ekg's flatlined and she was gone... It was cancer that claimed her, not the Altzheimers. It was like she was waiting for me to arrive. Why she held onto my memory after she had lost so many others, I'll never really know. That woman was the personification of love and of giving. Everything of value that I ever learned, I learned from her... You get a 10 from me, Amos, for this perfect reflective Haiku.

aw3haiku

02/13/2011

for days she waited- the shining light touches her happiness Valley.

PoetWithCancer commented on Winter's fading light

02-12-2011

I forgot to mention what you already know: your poem is in perfect haiku form. I very much like that you chose as a title "Winter's Fading Light" which then immediately comes to the reader again as the first line; it is a striking image, and powerful metaphor, and it is strengthened by the repetition. // Not only does your poem have deep and moving significance, but it reveals technical mastery of this poetic form. // I'll read and rate your other poems, later. --Michael LP, Mr. Poet

aw3haiku

02/13/2011

Michael, again, thank you......................... I am touched.

PoetWithCancer commented on Winter's fading light

02-12-2011

Okay, I couldn't resist. I know I said I would read and rate yours after you had read and rated some of mine, but I like these poems of yours, so I'm going to go ahead and rate this one a 10. // I like the metaphor "Winter's fading light" for an older person losing memory power and vitality. This is a sad and even scary poem. It evokes the fear of senility that I used to have (not worried about it happening to me now, but I care about those who suffer from it and those it threatens). // The image of your Grandma--no doubt a beloved person--searching her memories, or calling on her memories to recognize your smile--which is unfamiliar to her, at lest during the search time. // Haiku can be like a fist, and punch the reader in the solar plexus. This one punched me in the heart. // It is what I call weep-worthy. // 10 from me. --Michael LP, Mr. Poet

aw3haiku

02/13/2011

PWC I am honored to hear it as "weep worthy." Thank you. Yes haiku is most often that, a shot to the heart pulling you emotionally into the author poet's world, writing the haiku of their inspirational experience on your heart.

Poetry is not the expression of personality but an escape from personality.

T. S. Eliot (1888-1965) American-English poet and playwright.

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