Hair cut

Hair cut




I wanted a haircut.

“ So …..” He said.

“ Well…..” I responded as I
fitted my self into his chair as he draped me.

“ So….. What’ll it be?” – thick Russian accent -

“ Well…do you think if I get a number one it will make be look
like a bald guy?”

“A bald guy?” He glanced at my over grown 1.5 with the shine coming
through.

“No –(politely)- I think not a bald guy but if you want I show you number
one, OK, my friend? “

“OK”

He took an inch off the side with the clipper and rotated my head
so I could see # 1 in the mirror.

“So?”

“Well.”

“So you like?”

“Yea I like, do it!”
" you have thin fine hair "
You know for the first 25 years of my life barbers always told me i had
beautiful thick hair"
he stumbled and tried to recover .
.....but , my friend , you have very healty skin .
That really made me feel good beacuse I'm overfocused on my helath ..in general .
" Is that right"

"yes, many customer come here with thich hair but they dont have healthy scalp skin like you "
" this is bull shit I thought "
" yes many people with full thick hair havy oily , unhealthy skin, not like you "
I decide to leave it with the good feeling that i have healthy skin , compare dto others


Getting any cut that begins with a # 1
feels more like having your head sanded with
a vibrating power tool then what haircuts used to feel like?

But what the hell.


Silence …between us.

Wide screen TV above our heads- some late
afternoon TV talk show mixing in with the
buzzing ,blowing and chatter of the shop behind us .


I close my eyes. He sanded.

“So?”

“Yep” I opened then. (Knew the question to follow)

“ So what do you do?”

Barbers always wants to know what you do.

I try to give them as little as possible- to start.

“ I’m in business “

“Oh”

“Yea”

“What kind of business?”

“Well”—

“ I’m an inspector for the New York State Barber and Hair Saloon
Commission……………”

His eyes zapped away from his routine 20th haircut of the day- sleepy gaze- and
drilled right into my dark brown mirror eyes.

Silence…Silence. hold out a little longer.

Big smile ……

“Only kidding. Only kidding” …

Relief … he smiled big. Began sanding again.

“You funny guy.” (Heavy cigarette breath)

“Yea me funny guy.”

“So.”

“Yep”

“No ,actually, I’m in the plastics business.”
But that was all I’d give him - and went right to the stock market.

(My days of teaching barbers my businesses are over)

“The market must be down” I said

“NO! Why you say this?” He seemed distressed.

“Bad news this morning in the papers.”

Ears perk up in the shop.

Another barber comes over – Russian too.

“Why you say market down- market is up.” Says barber 2

“I don’t think so.”

“We have TV - we check.”

“Go ahead.”

Remote control click to a business news show.

248 points - barber two looked relieved.

“No it’s down 248. See its negative.” I say

“How you knew this?” HE CURSED

“I just knew. Bad news overnight in Asia and bad news in morning papers means
market will go down.”

Barber 2 asks - “you stockbroker?”

Barber one, the sander, says “No he is businessman; plastics business.”

My head was looking good I thought, neat clean: bald.

I’m a number one guy now.

I began to think about fractions- for a second.