Spring

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Poem Commentary

My first ever poem! Please comment and critique!

Spring


 

Even after all the trials

Those small wounds their hearts sparkled brightly,

He kept quiet, to himself for all that time,

She was very happy about it,

Because those tender times flew quietly; time flew so fast that

She didn't even notice her spring was there.

 

How high could he fly till he sees her no more?

His love, that spring, it kept on lusting,

Searching and hoping after their promised time has expired,

Looking for a window to make love fall on their hearts again,

Still waiting for that day,

When spring transfer into light that guides lovers back,

To the legendary spring which used to be,

They will grasp it tenderly then, and

Lock it in between their racing heartbeats,

They will not let go,

Never let go.

 

Winter days were long,

Those days were when they longed so much,

Now are the days where hilarity abandons their time,

As they are holding each other tightly,

Replacing each other's shadows along the way of eternity,

Spraying roses and scent,

Walking through the road of their new spring.

 

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MalikPeterson commented on Spring

02-16-2011

This is pretty good for your first ever piece...it is very emotional and the tone is very consistent...keep it up and let me know when you have more!

Musicmynded1 commented on Spring

02-11-2011

I feel the deep emotion within the words of your poem. I especially am drawn to the line... How high could he fly till he sees her no more? (Welcome to the site:)

Poetry is what gets lost in translation.

Robert Frost (1875-1963) American Poet.

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