first off, its
part comedy
part tragedy
part drama
part lame
i didn't really have motive for this
so please be nice
PS: the spelling? not so great
the grammar? not better

nothing to look forward to when i go to school
rather stay at home and sit in a stool
call up my friends and have a little party
when the guys come over, i'll act like Matt Hardy
i will run around like a Super Bowl champion
with my girl by my side her name is just Camoren
i will chill with the boyz Mikey and Jake
but if i see Ian I'll beat him with a rake
i found little Tasha in the kitchen talking Mary Kate
i slapped her butt made her drop her plate
she screamed out "Jerry!" with that annoying voice
so i gave her a hug, i had no choice
as we all walked back into the living room
guess who came in none other than Chad with a boom
i walked on over to shake the mans hand
he's the drummer of my best friend hot new band
my ex Melissa is the lead singer
when shes not singing she watches Jerry Springer
Gary "Malary" played the electronic guitar
the name "Malary" came from a sticker on his car
the last member of the band is Tom on bass
but don't go near him hes a mental case
the name of the band is The final Affair
yes i named them cause they didn't care
the band's sound is like Green Day/ Sublime mix
when Tom sings he sounds like Nikki 6
their first cd was entitled Last Call of The Night
with songs like Under the Knife and The Local Fight
Melissa's favorite song is the one about her dog Max Sound
its written by her and called The Unforgettable Put Down
the story of the tragedy is as this
he was put down by a guy named Chris
when Max started to act all strange and weird
we thought he was growing in his beard
we took him to the vet who had bad news
Max had cancer, too many Mountain Dews
the doc said he had to be out down
or the cancer may spread around
Melissa couldn't believe what she just heard
she chucks a chair at the window, which is absurd
she sat down and started to weep
i hugged her and sat next to her in the next seat
days upon days she wasn't herself
she felt like a broken woddy doll being put on a shelf
i came up with an idea that might make her feel better
i told her to write a song and knit a sweater
even though she stole some lyrics from Offspring and Sublime
the song was pretty awesome, like what else to say at the time
she usually listens to songs like Dr Feel Good
she loves that classic stuff, its like her all day food
her room is flooded with ACDC and Tom Petty stuff
hell shes even got a trunk full of the Police Cuffs
ok her cd collection consist of some of the best
from Elvis to Bullet 4 My Valentine which is tatooed on her chest
her favorite song ever is like the greatest song ever
its Dumb by Nirvana which she plays forever
don't get me wrong she does hate some bands
like Simple Plan and Yellow card, they can kick the cans
just like me she cant stand rap
she understands its a load of crap
but when it comes to Paramore and the click five
she would give a limb to see them live
ok thats enough about dear old Melissa
now here is Gary Malary of Trista
Gary Malary is kinda like me
he likes to watch wrestling on the tv
i cheer Van Dam while he cheers for Cena
Van dam's the best but Cena's just a fake Marina
the Extreme Superstar and the former champ
hear the fans cheer and boo as they come down the ramp
that's not the only thing Gary likes
he also likes to take morning hikes
"CaptionMalary" is what his girl calls him
he calls her after the rugrat Kim
ok now off to Tom the nutcase
who thinks midgets are a different race
Tom was hit in the head when he was a kid
with a baseball bat by a guy named Sid
your probably wondering why he did it
just a week earlier Tom pushed him in a pit
why would Tom do that you may ask
well Sid asked Tom to do a special
it involved weed, a gun and a girl named Monica
it just just happened to take place in the same week as Hanukkah
He was supposed to to go and steal some weed
from the apartment of Monica Reed
you see the way Monica fits in the story
Sid fooled around with her while he was dating Lori
One day Sid was caught in the act
by a camera crew from he knew for a fact
he hoped in his car and drove away
called up Tom along the way
he told him about the girls and cheaters
and to meet him at the pub called Peter's
as soon as Tom sat Sid hands him a gun
he says "Guess what mate? Were gonna have a bit of fun."
"I want us to break into Monica's place
but be careful not to leave a trace"
Tom asks "Whats the gun for?"
Sid replys "Lets just say her brain may end up on the floor"
Tom wasnt the one to commit murder
So he was not gonna take this any further
he put the gun down and walked away
Sid said "Come on lad, dont be so gay"
Tom turned around and to his surprise
the gun was in his right between his eyes
just then a topless waitress came by
while Sid was distracted Tom hit the gun on the fly
it flew through the air and landed in some guys drink
but the dude was so drunk he didn't know what to think
so before he had a chance Tom punched Sid in the face
then he threw him into the drunk who fell in a gutar case
Tom grabbed the gun and ran all the way home
and hid the gun inside a garden gnome
the very next day there was a knocking at Tom's door
he opened it up and there was Sid looking like Pauly Shore
before dear old Tom had time to react
Sid hit him in the face with a baseball bat
Sid ran away and left him in as puddle of blood
he would've died there if it wasn't for his bud
Gary found Tom and took him to the hospital wing
the doc saw him and with a sigh she said "Poor thing"
they took him to the ER quick as a wick
Gary saw some blood and felt a little sick
they did all they could but it wasn't enough
its was short but his life was rough
Tom the Crazed will be missed by all
til' this day i can hear his call
remember if you know a friend who does drugs
get them to stop, even if it bugs