I would ask you to stay

If only I knew you could be happy here

If I could wake up where you are

And feel your grin warm on the nape of my neck

If I could know you would love the coming day

You know, it seems almost that come fall

When the leaves are all golden with the sun

Shining gently through the breeze, something

Brings you back to wherever I am

Only to take you, for reasons I have yet to understand

Looking for a home you can’t even find yet

And since I met you, that first fall when I had finally

Started looking, there have been times

When I could not stop grinning, could not stop

Singing your praises in my head

Only to find you taken by the winter winds

Wishing I’d told you that I have loved you

From the first time we met,

When you looked at me and said, “What will you have?”  

I wanted to say you

Having come seeking nothing it was all I could say

Tripping with my grin out the door

Wondering if this was what it felt like to fall

I was suddenly a paper wall around a sandcastle at high tide

Holding back an ocean of what I did not yet understand

Just about to break and ask if you could let me in

That fall you gave me the first impressions of what

I might someday hope to have

This fall when I begged you, the tide nearly overwhelming me again

To come back, come back and see me

Saying I’ll hold you up until you can swim again

You are always welcome in my home, or at least what used

To be my home, last year after you left I took a chance

On a painful mistake that threatened to drown me

Bringing you back, I have finally found my home again

It’s right where you left it

And in your leaving you left me at last

In my home again, no more crushing memories

Stopping me from sleeping, even if it is alone

But this time we were both broken like the sea over stones

But your presence was like a warm breeze

On a fall day, reminding me that happiness is possible

That love takes its form in verbs like when

You held me through my nightmares

I can never thank you enough in spite of this confusion

I’m left me left in; I would have been just your friend,

You know that, you have always known that

Just as you have always known I would jump at the chance

To wake with you every morning as long as we were around

To greet them, I’m not angry love; I’m not loosing sleep

I’m still eating now that I remember how again

You have taught me so much about what it could be like

To fall for a friend, but I didn’t expect to be your

First girl experience, not that I wasn’t pleased

But it’s just that I’m not the type who can pretend

The next day that nothing happened

I may no longer one for wearing a ring

Like a label for who I belong to, at lest not yet

But I could sure use an explanation on where you want this to go

I’ve always been here in whatever way I could be

So now I begging you, if you could you just tell me

If there might ever be a time, I could ask you to stay