not just shy

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  • Sadness

    not just shy

    I wake up every day drowning
    Remembering less of smiling then frowning
    Tonight depression will have its crowning
    As I cowardly submit to bowing

    I’m not up to par with your social level of interaction
    Never the one to start or continue a Conversation
    As my anxiety cripples any form of communication
    Solitude and insanity is always the conclusion

    As I tremble in fear
    My hand shakes a bit
    a mortal takes my hand and says
    O I use to be shy you’ll get over it

    Shy
    I long for shy
    And Anxiety disorder
    I wouldn’t even say goodbye

    No panic attacks
    No sleepless nights
    No mental arguments 
    And no suicidal fights

    I grow old 
    As I perform my short scenes
    In this repetitive play
    More often soliloquies 
    Never the protagonist
    Today’s script is “good day”

    This debate is put to rest
    And do you know why
    Because I am 
    Not just SHY

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    Poetry is not an expression of the party line. It's that time of night, lying in bed, thinking what you really think, making the private world public, that's what the poet does.

    Allen Ginsberg (1926-1997) U.S. poet.

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