not thinking

4 Comments

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  • Lost Love

    not thinking

     I wasn't thinking of you.
    I was only thinking of myself
    when I walked away from 
    our life together. 
    I wasn't thinking of you.
    I was only thinking of myself
    when I fell into the arms of 
    another. 
    I wasn't thinking of you.
    I was only thinking of myself
    when I forgot the vows
    I make to you---to love you
    for eternity.
    I wasn't thinking of you.
    I was only thinking of myself
    when I turned a deaf ear to 
    your words. 
    I wasn't thinking of you
    I was only thinking of myself
    when I ignored the 
    silent, hurt-filled eyes 
    of our children.
    I wasn't thinking of you.
    I was only thinking of myself
    when I tried to blame you
    for all that has gone wrong
    in my life.
    I wasn't thinking of you 
    and all of the joy, beauty, and
    love you brought into my life.
    You are not the cause, I am.
    You are not to blame,  I am.
    You did not do this to me. I did.
    I was only thinking of me,
    thinking of my failures, 
    thinking of my defeats, 
    thinking of my wants, 
    thinking of my needs, and
    thinking of my desires,
    when I pushed you out of my life.

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    Sammylin commented on not thinking

    07-14-2009

    Hi di47on, A very thoughtful work well painted! How oft (chukle) do we think we are doing something for our own selfish little wants forgetting about everything special around us, just so we would have that what we do think is right for us. Not that i ever went through stuff as dramatic as the people surounding the first person in the poem, but at moments in my life i did make small decisions which later on, i felt, were silly one's. A great read! Thank you for sharing! Greetings, Sammylin.
    Reply to Comment

    di47on

    07/20/2009

    Thanks for the encouragement. I am working on another work and I don't get to write poetry as often as I would like. I'm glad you liked it. I am always glad of feedback so if you think of anyway I can improve, Please let me know.

    Optionalsanity commented on not thinking

    07-10-2009

    First let me say I like this because of the two ways of looking at the speaker. He/She (I will use the feminine but it could be either) never says she is sorry about the choices made but just admits the choice was a selfish one. (she was only thinking of herself) I do not see where the expression is made that the speaker is not happy with the choice but just clearing the record as to why it was made and accepting the responsibility and acknowledging the selfishness. This could just be a conscience clearing exercise not a regret of the new situation. The narrator might be in a better place, looking at it from her selfish point of view, this is just letting the other person know how she got there. I guess if you feel that divine intervention will stop any good from coming from a selfish act then the regret is implied. I guess my misanthropic view and life experiences show me a different reality. Just my read (sometimes nothing like what anybody else will see lol). Though my interpretation is a little different than poetography's we both agree that this is a very nice piece.
    Reply to Comment

    di47on

    07/14/2009

    I deliberately left the speaker ambiguous--and open to the reader's interpretation. But in my experience (or I should say) my friend's her ex-husband was the one left with a feeling of imcompleteness after the divorce. He seemed to long for what he had destroyed.

    babyvic49 commented on not thinking

    07-09-2009

    now that was deep you really did a good job on that one
    Reply to Comment

    di47on

    07/09/2009

    Thanks. I am currently trying to get a book of Christian poetry published. Perhaps, you would like to read some of them? I am a staunch Christian and all of the poems, except one, is my original work. Let me know what you think.

    Poetry comes nearer to vital truth than history.

    Plato (BC 427-BC 347) Greek philosopher.

    di47on’s Poems (6)

    Title Comments Submitted
    Title Comments Submitted
    Connectivity 0 09/24/2009
    Creation 0 07/09/2009
    not thinking 4 07/09/2009
    Deception 1 07/09/2009
    Elsewhere 2 07/09/2009
    Sleepers 2 07/09/2009
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