THE BLOOM

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  • Extradonary Instant

    Poem Commentary

    i will apreciarte commets this was made instantly

    THE BLOOM

    TODAY A SPECIAL EVENT TOOK PLACE ON A SIDE OF A HEART TO BAD THE HEART WAS NOT READY TO GET WAT WWAS COMING

    EVEN THOGH THE HEART RECEIVE WAT WAS NOT WAITING FOR IT WAS PLEASE ANDIT WELCOME WAT WAS LANDED

    ONOTHER EVENT TOOK PLACE ON A DARK SIDE OF A BRAIN AND WAS NOT REALLY WELCOME BUT IT WAS STILL RECEIVE

    DO NOT WELCOME SOMETHING THAT WILL NOT BLOOM.


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    MikeSiZaChrist commented on THE BLOOM

    06-03-2009

    needs structure as the sentences form together making it difficult to read you can see by my demonstration how difficult it is to tell when i end a thought i just continue into the next. I like the concept but the form is harsh. also a spell check and subject-verb tense agreement "heart receive(s)" "it was please(d)"
    Reply to Comment

    MESIAS777

    06/09/2009

    THANKS SLOT FOR YOUR FEEDBACK ON THE POEM I REALLY APRECIATED

    Poetry comes nearer to vital truth than history.

    Plato (BC 427-BC 347) Greek philosopher.

    MESIAS777’s Poems (2)

    Title Comments Submitted
    Title Comments Submitted
    ALL YOU NEED 0 06/25/2009
    THE BLOOM 1 06/03/2009
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