Beasts of Springtime

1 Comments

Tags:
  • Life
    • ,
  • Nature

    Beasts of Springtime

    We are the beasts of springtime
    With the hearts of summer
    In the leaves of autumn.

    Our souls chase the west wind
    As we dance in the east sun
    And bask in the beauty of first light.

    Each heart sings to the wisdom of the north
    Along the sweet journey of the south.

    We live in the guidance of the Father
    As the beasts of springtime.

     

    Tara M. Barrett
    11/2/10

    Poem Comments

    (1)

    Please login or register

    You must be logged in or register a new account in order to
    leave comments/feedback and rate this poem.

    Login or Register

    RHPeat commented on Beasts of Springtime

    11-15-2010

    A very interesting poem Tara. However you might try to rid yourself of the over use of the word "of" as a metaphorical device. 7 lines out of 10 rely on it. And in my book it weakens the poem a lot. You might want to play with other more enlivened metaphors structures.... "of" is the simplest and easiest and is terribly over used to the point of boredom. The presented concepts are strong here and I do like the intent of the poem greatly. A poet friend// RH Peat
    Reply to Comment

    TBWyvern

    11/15/2010

    Thank you very much. I definitely see the reasoning and appreciate the help.

    Poetry is not a turning loose of emotion, but an escape from emotion.

    T. S. Eliot (1888-1965) American-English poet and playwright.

    TBWyvern’s Poems (10)

    Title Comments Submitted
    Title Comments Submitted
    Gossip 1 04/11/2011
    Codependence - One mother's love 0 12/21/2010
    Contradicting Day 2 11/18/2010
    Beasts of Springtime 1 11/03/2010
    Still Holding On 1 06/30/2010
    The Promise of Spring 0 01/22/2010
    On The Wind 2 09/13/2009
    Lost Spirit 1 09/04/2009
    Fall 2 09/04/2009
    Gifts 1 09/04/2009
    Top of Page