I Tried Not to Love You

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    Poem Commentary

    This is actually a song, and one I wrote about my ex-boyfriend who was nineteen years my junior.  It's a rock song and I wish I could sing it for you all. 

    I Tried Not to Love You

    I tried not to love you.
    I tried not to want you.
    I tried not to love you
    but I messed up again.
    I tried not to see you.
    I tried not to find you.
    I tried not to do it
    but I feel like I'm to blame.

    Remember when I told you
    that I wanted you to stay?
    Do you remember when
    you asked me why?
    I told you that I had no answers
    then or now or ever
    and I don't know why I'm here
    I only know it makes me high.

    And I swear to you that I am lost
    such a long damn bridge to cross
    I wonder if we'll ever find the way.
    And I've tried to make it up to you
    for all the shit that you been through
    I don't know how to make it easy
    I don't have the words to say.

    Will you be my guide
    on this trip we're on,
    will you hold my keys,
    will you see me home?
    Please don't let me run away
    I need to stay and fight.
    I can give you what I have to give,
    but you got to have what you need to live,
    and if it will not find you
    you better leave this all behind you.


    And I swear to you that I am lost
    such a long damn bridge to cross
    I wonder if we'll ever find the way.
    And I've tried to make it up to you
    for all the shit that you been through
    I don't know how to make it easy
    I don't have the words to say.


    I tried not to love you.
    I tried not to want you.
    I tried not to love you
    but I messed up again.


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    Poetry is either something that lives like fire inside you or else it is nothing, an empty formalized bore around which pedants can endlessly drone their notes and explanations.

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    sandmoran’s Poems (10)

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