Solitary confinement: My reality

3 Comments

  • sher92
  • "then she closed her eyes found relief in a knife the blood flows as she cries"~ between the trees

Solitary confinement: My reality

In this sterile solitude I reside

As I close my eyes

The dark deep abyss of my existence becomes unreal

As I fade farther and farther away from reality

I’m embedded in a cloak of numbness because I no longer feel

I give off a façade of sanity when in reality it’s all a bullshit lie!

I’m a prisoner to my dismal thoughts

I’m always trapped in a boundless depression

I try to escape my assailant but it’s impossible

It’s a constant harassment to my psyche

As my tears burn my flesh

My heart is thumping to an irregular beat

My shaking body

My breathing speeds up so rapidly

But there’s nothing I can do to escape myself

I realize my crass and unconventional friend can rescue me though

She can’t talk but she can listen

She doesn’t judge and stereotype me

She doesn’t perpetuate drama

And she doesn’t ignore me

Her stocker like tendencies are comforting when I need a friend

Her majestic physique stained and scoffed with volatile memories

But my friend is a selfish bastard

Taunting me with her faulty promises

And as the sick cycle of my life begins once more

I find myself falling deeper and deeper into this depression

And my infatuation with my dysfunctional friend starts all over again

 

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JadedJezzabel commented on Solitary confinement: My reality

07-10-2009

i speak from someone who has been where you are at......and did stay right there for way too long.......its not worth it baby girl

sher92

07/10/2009

Your the first person who has read this poem and have figured out what my "friend" is. The key line to figuring out what I'm refering to is "her majestic physique stained and scoffed with volatile memories". Addiction was the big bad hold on my life. But not drug addiction. I've had a problem with self injury for 5 years. I've found God and he has helped me tremendously. I no longer cut myself anyomre something i was physicaly and mentally addicted to since I was 11 and couldn't stop even when I wanted to. So you don't have to worry anymore but I realy realy appreciate the concern from a complete stranger. Sometimes all people need is someone to reach out to them and to feel appreciated and understood. Thank you.

JadedJezzabel commented on Solitary confinement: My reality

07-10-2009

ahhhhhhhh upon a reread you friend is a drug through becoming addicted has began to steal your fire away from you........profound and sad........i wish i could help you. wish you could see the beauty you have and the purity of mind that is creative and intellegent through my eyes......you alone hold the power little sis you alone will make your life what it will be good or bad.....dont let anyone or anything or any drugs take that power from you.

JadedJezzabel commented on Solitary confinement: My reality

07-10-2009

seems to me this friend is the you that resides in you......yes? good poem..... i wish i could give you a big hug and tell you everything will be alright little sis..........and protect you from a life that could be hard.....in a world that has gone mad.........just remember you are not alone.....many people feel just like you.

To have great poets there must be great audiences too.

Walt Whitman, American Poet (1819-1892)

sher92’s Poems (6)

Title Comments
Title Comments
a poem still in progress 1
Someone 5
To die inside 1
When I get old 5
Solitary confinement: My reality 3
Happiness 1