Miranda Rights

I'm a officer of the law and I'm here to serve and protect and advise you that I'm placing you under arrest at this time. Anything you say will be considered in the court of the law as fiction or the truth so help you God. My name is blank and my badge number is blank. This is standard procedure that I'm obligated to inform you of. I have treated you as a human being and have not harmed you during this process. You have the right to express your disagreement, in a soft spoken manner. You have the right to inform me that the handcuffs are fitted properly or are placed to tight. If theyre any witnesses to this arrest, they will be called upon for questioning by the state or by your defense. Do you understand so far? (yes or no) You have the right to call a family member, friend or an attorney. If i feel that you are not cooperating with my commands I have the right to force you to cooperate so this will go smoothly for me and you without any harm to me or the arrestee. You are considered innocent until proven innocent or guilty. I'm only here to do a job and not to convict you of no crime. Do you understand the Miranda Rights I have explained to you? I'm going to pat you down now, do you have anything that might poke me or might harm me in anyway? (yes or no) Okay then, I will proceed to place you in the back of my cruiser, I hope everything works out for you and hopefully we don't have to meet like this again. There will be a short questionnaire at the station for you to answer on my job performance and will only be viewed by my commander. This is what you are being charged with. Okay?