• Happiness
  • ,
  • Love

    Poem Commentary

    This piece is dedicated to anyone going through tough times in their relationship. Sometimes it takes losing someone to know how important they are to you. "You don't miss the water till the well runs dry." I wish you all the best of luck and I humbly thank you again for reading.


    What is it I’m hiding? What am I constantly doing wrong?
    You say you love me, yet we seem to never get along.
    It’s said that love is blind, well then, I’m removing the fold
    Look at me now, how do you see me, is our love becoming old?
    You’re my best friend, yet remorsefully, a friend I cannot trust
    Sadly with you, honesty has been lost, so then what does that mean for us?
    You’ve lied to me so many times, that for you truth is rare
    How can we call this love, if even the truth you won’t bare
    Do you believe that I’m closer to you, than most of my family?
    Still there are barriers up, that prevent you from being fam to me
    We try to talk it out, yet words don’t ever seem to aid
    So actions then I must take, to try and regain what we had made
    Let’s take a break maybe; absence makes the heart grow fonder right?
    So a break we take, as my mind happens to wander through the night
    Wondering what it is, that we need to repair this broken ship
    A beautiful vessel we had, to bad it waded then it dipped
    Now it’s drowning underwater, begging to become afloat
    I can’t do this on my own, please, grab a hold of this rope
    Let’s pull it up together; our hearts are still on board
    Life’s hard enough in itself, losing you I can’t afford
    We’ll work as one to win this feat, then claim our reward
    Wake up in each others arms, to see our love has been restored.
    Love isn’t easy, and I believe, it wasn’t made to be
    Yet that’s what makes it worth it, so thank you for loving me.
    Written 2/4/09

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    AnnointedNebula commented on Restoration


    I respect your effort and inspiration for this. Life, love, and death are some seriously deep topics to discuss. However, I'm feelin' the simplicity of your choice of words, yet the depth of their meanings. My writing style is somewhat similar. I'm not on very often to read/comment or reply; but, when I am best to believe that I am checking out some of what you got! Be blessed and stay focused..........

    knight4696 commented on Restoration


    Hey Twist - This poem is truly filled with pure emotion. As you stat in you biography, that you don't follow the rules. And in this poem, it shows, So be it. Because this poems meter may be off - but it doesn't matter. The emotions you envoke are strong and real - much more important than any poetic metric. A really nice job!!

    HarverTomsson commented on Restoration


    Unless the root for the dishonesty gets addressed, no effort, no absence, no strategy will rehabilitate the borkenness. HIgh hopes, but likely false hopes after all.



    sadly after more than a year of you posting this your words reign true...... false hopes after all. Newest poem sheds a little light on what I'm referring to......

    SmileyAngel138 commented on Restoration


    you can feel the emotions and the pain in this of is tricky and you showed it..great job :-)

    Sammylin commented on Restoration


    Hey TwistedAce, Again i had the pleasure to read some very fine worked out poetry, and i thank you for it! Love, mama mia, it is more than five hands full to be able to deal with it! I do admire the poets strenght and his never fading hope, it gives strenght and hope to the poems readers! And how overwhelmd did i become when getting to the delight of an ending! "Thank you for loving me." Beautiful!! Greetings: Sammylin.



    Without hope Sammylin I don't know what i would have done at so many points in my life. I have to incorporate that in my poetry :) I'm glad you enjoyed it. Thank you for reading my friend

    Poetry is either something that lives like fire inside you or else it is nothing, an empty formalized bore around which pedants can endlessly drone their notes and explanations.

    Unknown Source

    TwistedAce’s Poems (7)

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