There’s a burning on the inside of me….
A yearning that’s to hard to reach….
A sensation that has me tossing in the middle of my sleep….
I don’t know what it is….or the reason behind it…..
But I need to pray to God and ask for his help in finding it….
Cause whenever I’m going thru I look to God for my rescue…
And he answer’s me immediately….
But this burning has been going on for awhile….
And it’s hurting something on the inside….
When I’m awake in the day all my sorrows fall away….
But when I’m asleep in the night….
My thoughts and dreams are in a fight…..
Battling with my mind and my heart….
Trying to tear them apart….
Making me believe that my life has no purpose or meaning…
That I need to just sleep and keep dreaming…..
For my dreams take me to a place when my life was complete….
When the man of my dreams swept me off my feet…..
He made me believe in always and forever….
Not knowing that he was so very clever….
In making me believe we would always be together….
No matter the storm clouds or the weather…..
He kept me in a delusional state…..
In a mindset that was too hard to shake…..
That he loved me and only me…..
Unconditionally…..
So when he had that affair, I didn’t care….
It didn’t matter as long as we were together….
And when the baby came….. Yea it hurt….
But I thought it was something that I deserved….
Cause I didn’t love him like he needed to be loved…..
I wasn’t there for him like I should have been…..
I didn’t give him what he needed..…
Cause I worked to much or spent to much time taking care of home….
It gave him the opportunity to roam…..
And find love in another’s arms….
And my commitment to him stood true….
Cause I didn’t know what else to do…
But stay and take his infidelities to my heart…..
And pray one day that they would stop…
But they never did or never would….
Cause he just didn’t mean me any good….
So I prayed to find an answer to my situation……
Asked God to guide my decision ……
To leave and never return……
No matter what he might try to say or do…..
To make me believe his love was true….
And now my world is shattered and empty…..
Cause something on the inside is missing…..
But this yearning has to stop….
I can’t let it take control of my heart…..
I won’t let my world fall apart….
So I cried out to God for a solution…
Praying for a stop to this yearning in my soul….
Wanting to be released from this stronghold…
That has me chained and bound….
With no way of escaping….
And then he answer’s me just as quickly ….
Saying “Child all that you need is in me”
For you’re a woman of integrity….
And the purpose of your life is to follow me….
& walk into your destiny…..
Let nothing place a hold on thee…
Let no one take control….
For the burning on the inside of you is the purpose I placed in your soul…