frozen in fear

2 Comments

Poem Commentary

this is a bad memory but i wrote this the day after.....
my therapist wants me to put all my poems up even the painful ones so here it is

frozen in fear

she sits in the corner of her room looking at all her bruises cuts and memories
she wonders what she did to deserve this
she thinks back to the begining of her night
she was at her dads and he lied to her
he promised her he wouldnt make her go to anymore parties with him
becuase the parties were all guys and they were all a lot older than her
she was a beautiful young girl only 13
her dad told her that he had to go to the store and he said she needed to go with him to help
so she got ready
put her hair up really pretty
did her make up
wore a tank top that was too low cut for her age but thats how she was
and short shorts
she looked stunning
they got in the car and left
they drove right past the store
her heart started to beat fast
she knew once he drove by exactly where they were going
a party
she was scared froze solid in her seat
she knew the way she was dressed wasnt good
when they got there her dad took her and his friend to a gas station to get drinks and her a pop
when they got back she had calmed down a little her dads best friends daughter was there
shes 25 and her name is krista
it started getting a little crazy around 11
people were stumbling over things just being stupid she was scared
then a guy came and sat by her
he started to talk to her he hit on her and tried to touch her
then .................
his girlfriend showed up she was a lot bigger than this poor little girl
she tried to beat her up but her dad and her dads friend saved her
she ran to the truck crying
krista ran after her
she calmed her down and got her to go back it wasnt soon after that krista had to leave
she didnt like that
she was asked by her dad to go get a beer out of the fridge
she cringed you mean from in the house
he said yeah go get it
he had told her eariler not to go in there
but he made her
she walked in the door smelled a horriable smell there was a circle of guys smoking weed
she tought i will never do that these guys are messed up
she went to the kitchen ....
there was a guy in there
he had been eyeing her for a while now
she asked if he would move
he told her NO
she got chills she said please can i get in there my dad needs a beer
he again replied NO
he said its not in there its down here in this fridge come with me
so she did
well she was shoved into a room he said its about time i get you in here
she studdered wh wh wheres the fridge she was hardly moving she was so scared
FROZEN IN FEAR
he laughed locked the door and said theres not one in here i want you
he threw her into the wall
she fell to the floor he knocked the wind out of her
she could hardly breathe
he kicked her get up come on get up
she screamed
NO I WANT MY DAD
he punched her in the face held his hand over her mouth kissed her cheek
and said not another word understood
she shook her head yes
he took his hand off and the moment he did that she screamed again he kicked her punched her
told her if she did it again he would kill her
she was balling
she didnt know what to do
she thought will i ever see my family again,my friends, will i get married , will i have kids of my own
then all of those thoughts were shut down she quietly thought god please let me live
he kept punching her he wouldnt stop he threw her on the bed and put a pillow over her face ripped off her clothes and stole her innocence
while he was doing that he pulled out a knife and he would cut her every time he heard her start to cry
he finnaly stopped got dressed and ran out he left her there all alone to bleed and cry and wonder why me
she didnt know what to do
her dads friend found her helped her get cleaned up and got his other daughter to give her some clothes
so her dad took her home after that
so here she sits in the corner of her room looking at all her bruises cuts and memories
and wonders what she did to deserve all that
after that she got up found a rope and hung herself
sad thing is her dad was so drunk that night her dad didnt even remember what had happend
or why she did it

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tenderpoison commented on frozen in fear

06-23-2009

you mesmerize with the catastrophic...this is brutal in it's honesty and anyone reading it can only rage for the pain inflicted on one so young....there aren't enough words to encompass the healing and love I'd like to wrap you in. only to say, sometimes life is very cruel....but we can find the strength to deny the pain to destroy and instead use it...to define ourselves.

ilymanny

06/24/2009

thank you for careing so much and yeah it made me stronger it let me know that you can deff. be at your worst and get back up and go again and use that as a strength to keep going thank you

Artie commented on frozen in fear

06-23-2009

You just knocked me off my feet---------------------------------------------------------------------

ilymanny

06/23/2009

is that a good or a bad thing ?

Poetry is not a turning loose of emotion, but an escape from emotion.

T. S. Eliot (1888-1965) American-English poet and playwright.

ilymanny’s Poems (21)

Title Comments
Title Comments
one wish 0
you will never have to 1
frozen in fear 2
dear adam 2
sometimes 1
my never ending war 2
tonight is the night 0
a day with nature 0
daddy 1
my amazing brother rip 0
am i still the girl you fell in love with 0
god help me 1
too perfect 0
my lover and bestfriend 1
crying for help 0
triple c's 0
slow struggle 4
RIP RICHIE 2
shes always gone 5
Because of you 5
my whole world 2