Untitled

2 Comments

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  • Sadness

    Untitled

    What a fool.
         She thought this day would be special --
                        she was meeting a lover
                                                    for the first time
              today.

    Such a fool.
         Now she stands alone in a strange motel room --
                         she said something wrong
                                                    and he walked out
              on her.

    As she stares at herself in the mirror,
                         her reflection shouts obscenities at her,
                                         making her feel like such a
              nobody.

    So she leaves the room slowly --
                         closing the door quietly,
                                          leaving a part of herself 
              behind
                                          in the wastebasket
                                with the garter belt and stockings.

    Poor little fool.

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    StandingBear commented on Untitled

    06-29-2009

    A very thought provoking work. Nicely written with great great emotions in the verses. Great write.

    castlemist commented on Untitled

    06-20-2009

    Wow, this is strong. I never really thought about this point of view and you've drawn a perfect picture. Good work!

    NenaT

    06/28/2009

    This was perhaps the most torturous piece I've written. I tried to balance her devastation and humiliation with her self-loathing without diluting any of those feelings. Your comment tells me I succeeded. Thank you.

    A poem begins as a lump in the throat, a sense of wrong, a homesickness, a lovesickness. It finds the thought and the thought finds the words.

    Robert Frost (1875-1963) American Poet.

    NenaT’s Poems (31)

    Title Comments
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    The Breakup 2
    Gone 1
    Dreamers Dreaming 3
    ALONE 5
    When I Look For You 6
    The Goodbye 1
    Memories of a Tuesday Afternoon 3
    A Mother's Prayer 2
    She Loves Him 2
    THE HAWKMAN 4
    Este Corazon (My Heart) 0
    In Time 4
    The Rendezvous 1
    Unrequited 2
    JASON 2
    May-December Love 1
    Forbidden 4
    The Romantics 2
    La Paloma 0
    Wondering 4
    Los Angeles 0
    A Vague Farewell 0
    Ghost-Child 4
    Untitled 2
    Kaleidescope 2
    REFLECTIONS 1
    Sunday Morning 2
    Honky Tonk Angel 4
    It Was Only A Thought 1
    Untitled 0
    Welcome to My Hell 5