I Need Some Answers

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    I Need Some Answers

     I Need Some Answers
                           by brianlion

    Why do they design beer cans for men to open?
    Shouldn't beer cans be designed for woman?
    Women are supposed to open the cans,
    Then hand them to their man.

    Why is a bra spelled singular,
    And panties are spelled plueral.
    Shouldn't it be the other way around?
    Think about it.

    A diamond is said to be a girl's best friend. 
    A dog is said to be a man's best friend.
    I would like a recount.What were our other choices?
    Steak? Football? Sex? TV? How'd we get stuck with dog?

    I saw an ad for the upcoming  schizophrenic convention
    I can't get anyone to go with me.
    Anybody  who is everybody will be there.
    Think of it as a early halloween costume party with no costume.

    I saw a TV commericial where the woman says
    "Don't hate me because I'm beautiful".
    Shouldn't she have said, Don't hate because I'm beautiful
    Hate me because I have no talent and I'm making millions."

    I was listening to a TV preacher.
    He was preaching about the love of money.
    He said it was the root of all evil.
    He said-- for more information, send him $25.

    I watched my wife putting on her make up.
    Why can't women put on make up with their mouths closed?
    All women reading this, put on your mascara.
    See, you keep opening your mouth.

    Most people think time travel is impossible.
    Actually it is real and happens every day.
    I am a time traveler right now.
    Traveling at  60 minutes an hour.

    Why is it when peole make mistakes in the morning,
    They say, I just need my coffee.
    Doesn't that mean they'll still make mistakes
    Faster and with more energy?

    Have you noticed at work holiday parties
    There are 2 kinds of people?
    Friendly and want to stay, vs boring and want to go home early?
    Unfortunately, they are usually married to each other.

    I saw my ex girlfriend today.
    I remember what she said when we were together.
    She said she loved me so much,  she would die for me.
    I think I'm going to make her keep that promise.

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    In science one tries to tell people, in such a way as to be understood by everyone, something that no one ever knew before. But in poetry, it's the exact opposite.

    Franz Kafka (1883-1924) Czech writer.

    Brianlion’s Poems (81)

    Title Comments Submitted
    Title Comments Submitted
    Waste No Time Reading This 0 09/28/2010
    One Last Dance 1 06/11/2010
    woRk iN ProGresS 0 05/22/2010
    My Song of Songs 1 05/22/2010
    There Is No Almost Heaven 1 05/14/2010
    My Last Wish 1 05/13/2010
    there was a time 1 05/12/2010
    Baby's First Diary 1 05/10/2010
    This Is What Happens When Cousins Marry 0 05/10/2010
    Welcome to the Last Day of the Rest of My Life 0 05/08/2010
    Because Of You, There is Us 1 05/08/2010
    Life (Or Something Close To It) 2 05/08/2010
    Suicide Soliloquy 0 04/29/2010
    When Nature Calls 2 01/24/2010
    I WAS JUST WONDERING 0 01/07/2010
    Reading This will Cost You. 1 12/31/2009
    My Future Ex Girlfriend 0 12/31/2009
    THIS IS NOT MY LIFE 0 11/20/2009
    MY LIFE SO FAR 1 11/21/2009
    I HATE POSITIVE PEOPLE 1 11/12/2009
    The Luck Of The Irish 1 11/19/2009
    Things My Mother Never Taught Me 2 11/12/2009
    JOHN LENNON 0 11/10/2009
    I KNEW I WAS IN TROUBLE 1 11/10/2009
    The Opportunity Is There 1 11/27/2009
    The Dark Light 1 10/15/2009
    To My Friend 1 10/14/2009
    I Lost Control Of This Poem Early 5 10/14/2009
    I Need Some Answers 0 10/14/2009
    I Can't Wait To Read The Story of My Life 0 10/14/2009
    I Think Therefore I Think (I Think) 0 10/14/2009
    Amen and Amen 1 09/22/2009
    I MISS US, I MISS YOU 1 09/27/2009
    I'm 50- What Does It All Mean? 2 09/11/2009
    How Blessed I Am 0 09/10/2009
    This Is Not A Poem 4 09/16/2009
    You Decide 1 09/08/2009
    Now 1 09/11/2009
    You Will Always Be My Baby 2 09/09/2009
    You Will Always Be My Son 0 09/09/2009
    Pray Everyday 1 09/10/2009
    Broken Flower 0 08/15/2009
    BECAUSE I LOVE YOU STUPID 0 08/06/2009
    EVERYTHING ELSE, I MEANT THOUGH 0 08/06/2009
    GOOD DAY FOR A HANGING 0 08/20/2009
    Remembering Elvis 2 08/06/2009
    IMPORTANT TRIVIA 0 08/16/2009
    The Elephant Sitting In Your Living Room 0 09/11/2009
    A PICTURE OF YOU 2 09/09/2009
    LET ME THANK EVERY SOLDIER 1 07/30/2009
    I Want To Live Forever. So Far So Good 2 10/28/2009
    What I Need 4 07/30/2009
    Questions With No Answers 1 07/28/2009
    Emptying My Head Again 0 09/11/2009
    ORIGINAL POETRY DOT CALM 2 07/27/2009
    the nothingness of nothingness 0 08/03/2009
    Choices 0 10/15/2009
    MY LIFE 0 07/25/2009
    THE WHISPER OF A BUTTERFLY 0 08/23/2009
    YOUR BODY AND MY SOUL 1 07/25/2009
    SOMEWHERE UNDER THE RAINBOW 0 07/26/2009
    GRANDDAUGHTER 0 10/28/2009
    MELISSA 0 07/30/2009
    PATTI 0 08/06/2009
    I JUST FOUND OUT 0 09/11/2009
    MY EX GIRLFRIEND 0 07/20/2009
    REALITY 0 07/20/2009
    ODE TO MY MOTHER 1 07/20/2009
    WHO NEEDS ENEMIES? 0 08/15/2009
    LET ME COUNT THE WAYS 1 09/08/2009
    A SIMPLE CONVERSATION 0 11/20/2009
    FOR THE FIRST TIME IN MY LIFE 0 07/24/2009
    Secret Admirer 1 07/27/2009
    EVERYONE SAYS I LOVE YOU 2 07/15/2009
    MELISSIOUS 0 07/30/2009
    IF 2 08/31/2009
    FATAL VISION 1 07/15/2009
    IVE NEVER SEEN ANYTHING LIKE YOU 0 07/08/2009
    I DEDICATE MY LIFE TO LOVING YOU 3 07/08/2009
    SHE IS MY MUSIC 2 08/26/2009
    I AM 3 07/02/2009
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