Mixed Signals

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    • MayaReid
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    Mixed Signals

    I love you.
    I’m in love with you.

    But look at me.
    I’m pathetic.
    I’m self-destructive.
    I won’t do anything
    but bring you down.
    You deserve
    better
    than me.

    But how
    can I let you go?
    I can’t give you up.
    If you love someone,
    you've got to let them go –
    but I can’t.
    I can’t live without you.
    I won’t live without you.

    You are me,
    and I hope
    that I am you.
    To me,
    we are one.
    Without you,
    I cannot be.
    I’ll just wither up
    and die.

    I don’t want to hurt you.
    Baby,
    I love you.
    But I’m not good enough for you.
    You are going to go so far,
    and I don’t want to drag you down.

    I want to be with you.
    I want to be with you
    more that I ever thought
    I could want anything.
    I love you
    more that I ever thought
    I could love anyone.

    But I can’t do this to you.
    You’d be better off without me.

    I’ll die
    but to ensure that you live,
    it’s a small price to pay.
    Trust me,
    there are worse things than death.

    I’m a mess.
    I know I am.
    I panic.
    I forget to breathe.
    I am an endless flowing river
    of tears.

    But you stay with me.
    The only reason
    I can see for that
    is that you found something
    beautiful
    in me.
    You held that beauty up
    for me to see,
    and you alone
    have the power
    to make me feel beautiful.

    You gave me strength,
    and freedom,
    and introduced me
    to me.
    You showed me
    how life can be.

    You caught me once,
    but I’m slipping,
    and I need you
    to catch me again.
    You’re in the process of teaching me
    how to fly,
    angel of mine.
    I can’t do it without you.
    I can’t make it without you.

    What I’m trying to say now,
    though,
    is that I could make it with you.
    If leaving would hurt you
    as much as it’s going to hurt me –
    if,
    deep down inside,
    you do love me –
    then,
    by all means,
    stay.

    We can get through this together.
    I can get through this with you.
    Together we have power.
    Love is more powerful
    than anything else
    in the entire cosmos.
    Love conquers all.

    If I have your love,
    I can conquer this.
    Talk about mixed signals,
    but stay with me.
    Save me.
    Please.

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    Poetry is not a turning loose of emotion, but an escape from emotion.

    T. S. Eliot (1888-1965) American-English poet and playwright.

    MayaReid’s Poems (129)

    Title Comments
    Title Comments
    A Discourse on Discourse 1
    These Things 3
    Figures 1
    i should tell you 3
    Empire State 0
    Come Hell or High Water 1
    Where Do We Go From Here? 2
    Dispersal 0
    Let Me Count the Ways 1
    I am (or Kujichagulia) 2
    Six Degrees of Steparation 1
    My Best Friend's Wedding 0
    Reflection 0
    The Writing on the Walls 0
    To My Mother, on Her Fortieth Birthday 2
    Drunk Savior 0
    Dear Son/Daughter 2
    Escape Velocity 2
    The Whisper 4
    Rocks and Shoeboxes 1
    The Day We Almost Kissed 1
    Loving and Leaving 0
    The String that...Saved Me? 0
    The Love of My Life: Take Two 0
    The Divorce 0
    The Garden of Life 2
    Some Things I Know 1
    And One for Me? 4
    Storms 2
    Spider 0
    Specks -2
    Sorrow 0
    Sonnet III 0
    Sonnet II 0
    Sonnet I 0
    Sometimes 0
    So They Told Me Society... 0
    So I Heard In Class Today 0
    So Far Away 0
    So Beautiful 1
    She Will be Missed 0
    She Didn't Know 0
    Running for My Life 1
    Revolution Pie 0
    Revision 0
    Rejection 0
    Questions 0
    Pinnochio 0
    Owl 0
    Over You 1
    Our Silent Stranger 0
    Our Broken Possibility 0
    Originality 1
    One Coke with Two Straws 0
    On Loan from the Universe 0
    Nothing But Tomorrows 0
    Not to Be 0
    Not So Constructive Criticism 0
    No One Knows 0
    My Wish 0
    My Shackles 1
    My Friends 0
    My Dream Truth -1
    My Box 0
    Mother Dearest 0
    More 0
    Mixed Signals 0
    Maybe Crazy is Catchin' 0
    Maya... 0
    Loving You 0
    Love 0
    Losing Someone 2
    Life 0
    Letting Herself Love You 0
    Faith 0
    Kryptonite 1
    Just Listen 3
    It Seems Like I Can Only... 1
    Incarcerated 0
    If the Whole Wide World Was Up to Me 0
    If Only 0
    I Told You That I Loved You 0
    How Did You Get Here? 1
    Hoping Against Hope 0
    Hold Fast to Love 0
    Her Missing Soul 0
    He Told Me He Was Coming 0
    Half 0
    Growing Up With You 0
    Go Ahead and Gasp 0
    Giving Thanks 0
    Game. Set. Match. 0
    Freedom 0
    For You I Will 0
    Flying from the Masquerade Ball 1
    Finding the Lost You 0
    Fell 0
    Falling 1
    Extraordinary Girl 1
    Effortless 0
    Dying Without You 0
    Drifting Apart 1
    Don't Make Me Any Promises 0
    Differences 2
    Did You Ever Wonder... 2
    Despite Our Efforts 1
    Depression 3
    Defining Me 1
    Deeper 1
    Dear Daddy 3
    Come to Me 0
    Closets 3
    Broken, Bruised, and Bloody 2
    Breaking Through the Sky of Lies 1
    Blue 3
    Bloody Love 0
    Birthday 1
    Between 0
    Be Good to Your Daughters 2
    Band Aids 1
    An Ode to Music 4
    An Ode to Dreaming 1
    Americans, the Circus Folk 4
    Alone 2
    A.D.D. 3
    A Not a Poem Poem 3
    A Love Forgotten 3
    A Love Deferred 1
    A Beautiful Lie 7