"THE INVISABLE BRAND"

Born to a family of hate

Youngest of three, only girl

I'd think they'd be happy with fate

Another mouth to feed, put me on the tilt-a-whirl

Poverty corrodes a mind like rust

She tells me how I was prayed for

Yet nothing in the pantry but dust

Hatred and bitterness settles the score

Not enough money or food to go around

A hungry, crying infant, six months old

Getting slapped for crying when doctor bound

Bruises on my tiny body, no doctor I am later told

No neighbors and no playmates

Dad is always working, brothers hate me

Even at that age praying for Pearly Gates

I was a constant reminder, plain to see

She told me how she would pray for me

Already two boys but years pass

She wanted a girl so desperately

Yet once I arrived, she beat my ass

I'd get so excited when my brother would play

A game a small girl didn't understand

He was ten, I was three, no way!

She didn't pay attention, now I have a brand

The brand is invisable, it's in my head

It seemed better then being ignored or being beat

These were my options instead

Now I live with what was done, like a group of elite

The pain became way too much

I drank and drugged to forget

If it wasn't him, someone else would touch

Drink to drown my shame, but yet

It never got better, only worse

This little girl they prayed for

Was praying herself, but for a hearse

Made to believe I was a whore

The sadness seen in my eyes

Party like a rock star to forget

 "Can't even kill myself right!", she cries

Cries a river, her face red and wet

She graduates, gets married, has a baby

A beautiful wonder to behold

Finally her chance, just maybe

He became her next violator 'til she told

Three babies later, nothing has changed

Can't keep a marriage together at all

Finally sober, with clear eyes she sees the range

Of damage caused like hitting a brick wall

Permanent damage in the name of love

She'll never be the same, no way

She has a higher power from above

Yet all that pain is carried to this day

Her three children kept her alive

They needed her, relied on her

They loved her, and needed to survive

All for them, that is for sure!

Dori Wheeler   26may09