I Hate Myself

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  • Anger
    • ,
  • Sadness

    I Hate Myself
    I try not to cry,
    Try to make my eyes dry.
    I keep my mouth shut,
    So I don’t ask now what.
    I hurt all over but not on the outside,
    I feel like everyone’s just using me.
    It’s no one’s fault,
    It’s just locked up in a vault.
    I want to escape this place,
    Never again want to see my face.
    The mirror it haunts me,
    It won’t let me flee.
    I want to run away,
    But it keeps getting in the way.
    I hate what I’ve become,
    I’m so stupid, so dumb.
    I try so hard to be good,
    To be what you all think I should.
    I know I’m not right,
    I’m not okay or alright.
    I want to go home,
    But I feel so alone.
    I’m already in my bed,
    But that keeps running through my head.
    I feel so alone,
    I don’t like being on my own.
    I feel so scared and sad,
    Like I’m so horribly bad.
    I wish I was as talented as you say I am,
    But no one really cares or even gives a damn.
    I hate myself for what I’ve become,
    I hate myself I feel like scum.
    I want to be happy,
    I want to be free.
    I wish I knew what life should be,
    Don’t want to go back to how I used to see.
    I want to change myself,
    Stop putting things on that little shelf.
    I don’t want to be me,
    I just want to be free.
    I try not to cry,
    Try to make my eyes dry.
    I keep my mouth shut,
    So I don’t ask now what.
    I hurt all over but not on the outside,
    I feel like everyone’s just using me.
    It’s no one’s fault,
    It’s just locked up in a vault.
    I want to escape this place,
    Never again want to see my face.
    The mirror it haunts me,
    It won’t let me flee.
    I want to run away,
    But it keeps getting in the way.
    I hate what I’ve become,
    I’m so stupid, so dumb.
    I try so hard to be good,
    To be what you all think I should.
    I know I’m not right,
    I’m not okay or alright.
    I want to go home,
    But I feel so alone.
    I’m already in my bed,
    But that keeps running through my head.
    I feel so alone,
    I don’t like being on my own.
    I feel so scared and sad,
    Like I’m so horribly bad.
    I wish I was as talented as you say I am,
    But no one really cares or even gives a damn.
    I hate myself for what I’ve become,
    I hate myself I feel like scum.
    I want to be happy,
    I want to be free.
    I wish I knew what life should be,
    Don’t want to go back to how I used to see.
    I want to change myself,
    Stop putting things on that little shelf.
    I don’t want to be me,
    I just want to be free.

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    Sosoamazing2009 commented on I Hate Myself

    07-13-2009

    Wow, this is a really good poem. In a way I think that you and I probably have a lot in common.
    Reply to Comment

    Poetry is not an expression of the party line. It's that time of night, lying in bed, thinking what you really think, making the private world public, that's what the poet does.

    Allen Ginsberg (1926-1997) U.S. poet.

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