Not Who I Want To Be

0 Comments

Tags:
  • Inner Self
  • ,
  • Me

    Not Who I Want To Be

    I’m nervous and scared,
    My teeth, not bared.
    I’m not quite mad,
    Maybe just a little sad.
    I want to go home,
    To a place I’m not alone.
    My hearts always pounding,
    I need something grounding.
    I want to feel real,
    Just to be able to feel.
    Under my breath I talk to myself,
    Instead of putting things on a shelf.
    I understand me,
    I know who I want to be.
    I’m not who I thought,
    I’m who I always fought.
    Who I never wanted to be,
    That’s me.
    I’m nervous and afraid,
    Making sure I won’t pick up that blade.
    The feel sounds so nice,
    But the consequence too big of a price.
    I feel all alone,
    Like I’m all on my own.
    I want to be where you are,
    Want to be a shining star.
    I want to change everything I am,
    Because I know it’s all just one big sham.
    I’ll cry alone all night long,
    Until I believe that I am wrong.
    I’m scared to see,
    Just what I’ll be.
    What I’ll end up like,
    What will be the final strike.
    What will happen to me in the end,
    How will the world bend?
    I’m shaky and scared,
    Just wish that you cared.
    I wish I was right,
    I try with all of my might.
    I’ll never be it,
    Not worth this big skit.
    I’m nervous and scared,
    I just wish you cared.
    I’m nervous and scared,
    My teeth, not bared.
    I’m not quite mad,
    Maybe just a little sad.
    I want to go home,
    To a place I’m not alone.
    My hearts always pounding,
    I need something grounding.
    I want to feel real,
    Just to be able to feel.
    Under my breath I talk to myself,
    Instead of putting things on a shelf.
    I understand me,
    I know who I want to be.
    I’m not who I thought,
    I’m who I always fought.
    Who I never wanted to be,
    That’s me.
    I’m nervous and afraid,
    Making sure I won’t pick up that blade.
    The feel sounds so nice,
    But the consequence too big of a price.
    I feel all alone,
    Like I’m all on my own.
    I want to be where you are,
    Want to be a shining star.
    I want to change everything I am,
    Because I know it’s all just one big sham.
    I’ll cry alone all night long,
    Until I believe that I am wrong.
    I’m scared to see,
    Just what I’ll be.
    What I’ll end up like,
    What will be the final strike.
    What will happen to me in the end,
    How will the world bend?
    I’m shaky and scared,
    Just wish that you cared.
    I wish I was right,
    I try with all of my might.
    I’ll never be it,
    Not worth this big skit.
    I’m nervous and scared,
    I just wish you cared.

    Poem Comments

    (0)

    Please login or register

    You must be logged in or register a new account in order to
    leave comments/feedback and rate this poem.

    Login or Register

    The true philosopher and the true poet are one, and a beauty, which is truth, and a truth, which is beauty, is the aim of both.

    Ralph Waldo Emerson, American Poet (1803-1882)

    DylanAKayanN’s Poems (246)

    Title Comments
    Title Comments
    Sex Without Love 4
    Roaring Desire 1
    Summit 0
    Red Luscious Lips 0
    Run Away 1
    Rejected 1
    Replaced 1
    Petals And Thorns 1
    Our Passion 1
    My Passion Only Burns For You 0
    Moonlight 0
    Make Love To Me 0
    Longing For You 0
    Is There Life After Love 1
    I Write 0
    I Want... 0
    I Thought You Were The One 0
    I Should've Known 0
    I Promise 0
    I Cry 1
    Heritage 0
    Heat Of My Desire 0
    Hear Me With Your Eyes 0
    Hard To Let Go... 0
    Forgive Me 0
    Forget to Remember 0
    Forever 0
    Forever 0
    For You 0
    Drip Drops Won't Beckon 0
    Disturbia 0
    Complicated? 0
    Children, And Forwarded In Mud 0
    Caressing You 0
    Carefully Taught 0
    Burn And Crumble 0
    Broken Heart 0
    Because I Love You 0
    Arkansas Earth 0
    Untitled 0
    Arkansas Heart 0
    Your Love 5
    Your Kiss 5
    Your heart 2
    You'll Learn 1
    You Have The Key 0
    You Are My Everything 0
    You And Me 0
    Would You Love Me 0
    Would You 0
    Worthless 1
    Why Don't You Listen 0
    Why Can't You See 0
    Why Am I Dreaming 0
    When Will It End 0
    When Did I Lose You 1
    What's Love? 0
    What You Do To Me 0
    What Love Is 0
    What I've Lost 0
    What Do You Do 2
    Waiting Alone 0
    Waiting 1
    Us 0
    Too Much 0
    To That Special Someone 0
    To My Ex 0
    To Much 1
    To an Absent Lover 0
    Thus 0
    Thought About You 1
    The Tone Of My Pain 0
    The Pain 0
    The Kiss 0
    The Key To My Heart 0
    Thanks To You 0
    Tell Me Why 0
    Tears Of Pain 0
    Teardrops In The Night 0
    Sweet Sin 0
    Sweet Darkness 0
    Suicide II 1
    Suicide I 0
    Suicidal Love 0
    Stolen Heart 1
    Sorry 0
    Something More 0
    So Many 0
    So Lost And Confused 0
    So Far 0
    Since I Met You 0
    Side By Side 0
    Sick And Tired 0
    Shattered 0
    Shadowed 0
    Run Away 0
    Replaced 0
    Rejected 0
    Pretty Poison 0
    Poet To Her Love 1
    Please Stop 2
    Please 1
    Picture In A Frame 2
    Peace 0
    Painful Love 0
    Painful 0
    Pain In My Life 0
    Pain 0
    Our Limited Time 0
    One More Day 0
    One Day 1
    Of Whom You Cared For 0
    Not Who I Want To Be 0
    No More Reasons 1
    No Affection 0
    Never Would Have Thought 0
    Never Let Go 0
    Never Before 0
    Never Before 0
    My Unhealing Broken Heart 1
    My Perfect Guy 0
    My Pain 1
    My Love You Stole 0
    My Love 1
    My Heart 0
    My First Love 0
    My Dear Destiny 0
    My Angel 0
    Mother 1
    Missing You 0
    Missing Him 0
    Miles Between Us 0
    Many People 0
    Low Self Esteem 0
    Love's Complicated 0
    Love Wasted 0
    Love VS Fear 0
    Love Lasts Forever 1
    Love Is 0
    Love Hurts The Most 1
    Love And Friendship 0
    Love And Darkness 0
    Love And Adore You 0
    Love Ain't 0
    Long Distant Relationship 1
    Like I Didn't Matter 0
    Life In Pieces And A Broken Heart 0
    Life After Death 0
    Lately 0
    Kitties And Rainbows 0
    Just Fine 0
    Is Love Real 0
    Insane 0
    I'm In Love With You 0
    I'm Waiting... 0
    I'm Not Perfect 0
    I'm Broken 1
    Illegal Lover 1
    I'll Prove It 0
    If You Were Coming In The Spring 0
    If You Ever Need Me 0
    If Only You Knew 0
    If Only 0
    If Life Was A Dream 0
    I Would Live In Your Love 0
    I Wish It Were You 0
    I Will Always Love You 0
    I Want To Stop 0
    I Want To Know 0
    I Truly Love You 0
    I Truly Do Love You 0
    I Think... 0
    I Still Love You 0
    I Sleep With Thee 1
    I See Me In You 0
    I Quit 0
    I Promise To My Love 1
    I Need You 0
    I Miss You So Much 0
    I Loved You 0
    I Love You, It Hurts 0
    I Love You 0
    I Love Him 0
    I Like You 0
    I Imagine 0
    I Hate The Way 0
    I Hate Myself 1
    I Feel Nothing 0
    I Can't Forget 1
    I Am Alone 0
    I Am 0
    Hiding 0
    Hidden Child 0
    Heart Broken 0
    Guardian Angel 0
    Gone 0
    Fuck 0
    Forget, Remember 0
    Forget 0
    Forever And A Day 0
    Forbidden Love 0
    Fighting Back The Tears 0
    Falling Away From You 0
    Falling 0
    Faith 0
    Eyes Of Raging Madness 0
    Everything You Ever Wanted 0
    E-M-P-T-Y 0
    Emotions 0
    Emo 0
    Don't 0
    Despite 0
    Depression 0
    Decisions 0
    Darlin' I Can't Explian 0
    Daddy's Little Girl 0
    Cutting 0
    Cuts 2
    Crying Over You 0
    Cruel World 0
    Crazy Emotions 0
    Confusion 2
    Come Back 0
    Chance 0
    Dear Father 3
    Crazy Crush 0
    Blackened Rose 0
    Beholding The Fall 0
    Because Of You 0
    Be What You Are 0
    Backstabbing 0
    Baby Love Is All I Have 0
    Baby I Love You 2
    Continuous Dream 0
    Away 0
    As I cry 0
    An Argument 0
    Am I Dreaming 1
    Alone 0
    All You Have To Do 0
    All I See 0
    Agoraphobia 0
    About Love 0
    A Lonely Little Girl... 1
    A Heart To Trace 1
    2 Years 3