Lovesick, Lonesome Blues

11 Comments

Tags:
  • Heartbreak
    • ,
  • Lost Love

    Poem Commentary

    This is an acrostic poem written for the daily poetry challenge, that turned into a blues song.

    Lovesick, Lonesome Blues



    Looking out my back window,

    O’er cross the fields,

    Visions of your loveliness,

    Enveloped the atmosphere  (Oh Baby)

    So sad & lonely, so sad & lonely, so sad & lonely

    I could cry (Blues Riff)

    Carried by six,

    Killed by but just one,

    Love left me for dead,

    Oh! - My heart ate the gun

    Now I’m, sad & lonely, sad & lonely, so sad and lonely I could cry (Riff)

    Everlasting pain,

    Silhouettes in the rain,

    On my knees in the soil, and I’m, begging for your restraint!

    My mind can’t speak,

    Empathy’s for the weak, she says,

    Baby you’ve given me, these!

    Lovesick, Lonesome Blues! (Riff)

    Unable to play my guitar, ya keep my soul in your jar,

    Even my chords lost their heart , but ya, knew it from the start! Now I’m,

    So sad & lonely, sad & lonely, Oh so, sad & lonely, I could die (Riff)


     

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    cdeluhery87 commented on Lovesick, Lonesome Blues

    04-29-2010

    This is just wonderful...aside from the challenge of it being an acrostic...its simply wonderfully written!
    Reply to Comment

    thecross commented on Lovesick, Lonesome Blues

    04-27-2010

    Great emotion used in this piece of pain and sadness, good write
    Reply to Comment

    eddie14 commented on Lovesick, Lonesome Blues

    04-26-2010

    theres a song in there and its a hit LOL. this is writing that hits me in the heart i can relate to sadness pain and lonilessn the blues this was very good
    Reply to Comment

    optimistic commented on Lovesick, Lonesome Blues

    06-25-2009

    Great write not to familiar with blues yet It gave me a since of your hurt and pain yet able to spin that on a chorus good write.
    Reply to Comment

    laydbak1 commented on Lovesick, Lonesome Blues

    06-25-2009

    I tried singing this to the melody of elvis's heatbreak hotel, but it didn't meter right for that, so i tried another standard 3 chord blues progression and i still couldn't make it work, for me that is... bobby dylan might want to talk to you about the title though... lol... a good write..
    Reply to Comment

    Poetry is not an expression of the party line. It's that time of night, lying in bed, thinking what you really think, making the private world public, that's what the poet does.

    Allen Ginsberg (1926-1997) U.S. poet.

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