A Plain Poem

6 Comments

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  • Friendship

    Poem Commentary

    Occam's Razor slices short and sweet.

    A Plain Poem

    I wish to write a plain poem

    Straight and to the point

    Like when fire is made,

    So flames will warm the room.

     

    Chill soon sloughs off walls,

    Air heats, and then it stirs.

    Tongues risk to tell the truth 

    While lips lisp it soft and low.

     

    Words do not have to rhyme

    And short ones work the best,

    Now time, thus spent, just goes

    So you will want more times.

     

    Times when pulse is quick

    Times when hugs go slow

    Times when you must kiss me

    To learn if like, means love, too.

     

    I wish to write a plain poem

    That speaks just of you and me,

    To free your heart and more,

    When fire warms the room.

     

    Well, why not, you and me?

    Don’t miss this chance at bliss,

    When you so stir my fire,

    That I shall be your room.


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    Hampton commented on A Plain Poem

    02-16-2010

    A quirky write but an enjoyable read. Harver your willingness to reach into unchartered territories is a joy to behold.

    HarverTomsson

    02/16/2010

    See Aria's comments for a few quirk removal steps. lol

    sammia commented on A Plain Poem

    02-16-2010

    Well written, you go straight to the point. This my friend is a plain poem. Great message written throughout this piece. Loved the flow and the wording.

    HarverTomsson

    02/16/2010

    Thanks for reading. HT

    Rhymer commented on A Plain Poem

    02-16-2010

    This a well written plain poem with no hidden meanings for the reader to decipher, a refreshing read. 10 from me.

    HarverTomsson

    02/16/2010

    Thanks Rhymer, have a phat Fat Tuesday.

    SavVySam commented on A Plain Poem

    02-16-2010

    This will probably be the strangest comment I've ever made...but Thanks....for cutting through the crud..not mincing words..saying it like it is! Nice poem concept, good for you!

    HarverTomsson

    02/16/2010

    Actually, not to argue the point, but except for poem, each word held just one syllablic note. Kinda hard to mince words any finer then that. LOL But that was the poem's concept, and I didn't like "verse," or "ode" for connotative reasons. So I just kept "poem."

    Poetry is either something that lives like fire inside you or else it is nothing, an empty formalized bore around which pedants can endlessly drone their notes and explanations.

    Unknown Source

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