Poem Commentary

I would really appreciate everyone's unique individual interpretation of this short piece... I was originally going to title it Fear The HangMan. Ah... a new title altogether.. thanks ming ... I'll try that and I never change titles.. revised from Un-existing. Soul


Wanting to exhale

Searching to hear even a whisper of a breath

Waiting to be awakened

Feeling as if life exists within a hallowed void

Being Covered by a pale shade of nothingness

The numbing is less than peaceful

Then the disappearance becomes spatial

Suddenly knowing that the time missing -

  - Is the time that death sang a lullaby to your soul


Poem Comments


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dancinghawk commented on L I M B O


LIMBO is perfect for this state ... part Dante, part transmigration of the soul ... and part good ol' U.S. of A. livin' ... zombies everywhere, holy cats ... great write, interpret-able in many ways, which is my favorite, like an abstract painting ... -dh



Greatly appreciated - love your outlook... thx Smiles Soul

Marsink commented on L I M B O


I don't know what Limbo really is...Some may have its need in inventing hope for fixing what was never accomplished while the living made their choices...As to your inventive construct and eerie, out-of reality-mood, this is a solemn, sad, void that exists in the soul's vacuum between 'shoud have, would have, could have' and 'Oh, my God! It's You!!' Thanks for an evocative and age-old question of 'what's after this life?' Applause Building!!!



I have to say that your comments are eloquent and insightful... it is great that there are so many different personal comments to this piece.

Ming commented on L I M B O


The title that comes to mind for me, the image in my head is "L I M B O" that space between there and here, now and death, being and not being., the difference between the journey and the quest. Just my 2cents. -Ming



Thanks my friend for the comment... and I like your suggestion of .... had crossed my mind at one point and I am now going to change it which I never do after I have titled a piece. Soul

optimistic commented on L I M B O


I did not want the poem to end I gues all ends to a thought pictured in your mind what a fabulous poem this was.

thecross commented on L I M B O


I'm gonna have to agree with RhPeat on this one about attempting this without the "ing" words. I feel too many ing words can take away from the potential of a piece, especially a shorter piece such as this where I feel stronger tighter words would fill out this write nicely,



Your words of inspection are most appreciated - a total rewrite would be quite the task, however I will use the words of wisdom for the future............. Soul The great thing about poetry is that most pieces are fully open for interpretation and the different views of many make for a great collection of thought!

Poetry is what gets lost in translation.

Robert Frost (1875-1963) American Poet.

soulwriter’s Poems (53)

Title Comments
Title Comments
Along Came A Spider 0
Within This Well Worn Box 2
A Writer's Amnesia 2
Contentment 2
Love Hurts 6
Sadistic Captivity 0
Within This Glass 2
A Boy Named Alice (I dream of white rabbits) 57
L I M B O 21
Beautiful Stranger 19
Symbolic Differences 17
Drowning in a Sea of Me 18
Without Fail 16
Oil Painting 12
Beneath the Tree 42
Pretty Bullets 32
Wishing Her Well 18
The Death of Life 22
Don’t Live Without Love 17
Never Ever After 14
Nature's Little Surprises 16
Love, Lust, and Lingering Sensations 13
My Haunting Heart 17
Weathering The Winds of Trust 12
Do That Again Please 21
Love's Coffin 48
It Hurts 31
In Every Living Space 14
Gargoyle (Girl) 27
Controlled 14
Your Love Is Poetry 25
Why Not Spend A Fantasy On Me 13
Nothing Can Compare 8
Melancholy Cure 10
Our Daydream Dance 8
Vanishing 30
All That You Are 10
Words Worth 43
Black 37
The Toy 23
The Rose Eternal 28
Whisper From Behind the Mirror 38
Stormy Purification 13
Love Stains 19
The Tree Within 19
I Practice Moving Meditation... 12
The Gallows of Destructive Love 10
Love of the Soul 15
Crystal Iris 14
The Nature of Relationship 24