Almost There

2 Comments

Poem Commentary

I've come to like this poem a lot for one of my own pieces. Criticisms are always welcome!

Almost There

This pain is discharged like internal light;
God comes to cleanse me in the midst of night.
Maybe I need this and maybe I don't;
Maybe he'll save me, maybe he won't.
The miles of wires don't sever this bond,
Needs and desires won't tear down the strong--
This is what I needed, all along.
Like the blind that can hear and the deaf can see,
We're capsules in an endless sea;
In the open water I'd be free,
But until then I'll never breathe...

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Charlie23 commented on Almost There

07-13-2010

I've read quite a few of your poems, although I only commented on two. You seem to have a thing for water... love what you do with it.

Merlyn commented on Almost There

06-27-2010

Nice write. Strong message. I love the last line. I remember feeling that way for about 20 years. You will make it! God Bless you.

FadingFebruary

07/13/2010

Thanks for the encouragement! Your comment reminds me of my friend, because she and I always seem to have opposite opinions on our works--the least favorite line in my poem will be her favorite line of it, and I do the same with her poems.

Poetry is what is lost in translation.

Robert Frost (1875-1963) American Poet.

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